The horror chiller "The Devil Inside" (O out of ****) gives movies about exorcism a bad name. Face it, William Friedkin's "The Exorcist" (1973) still ranks as the best exorcist movie of all time. Nothing made since then can match the impact of this landmark movie, least of all its lackluster sequels. Nevertheless, Hollywood continues to crank out new movies about exorcism as if time had eroded the demonic fury of "The Exorcist.” Warner Brothers did the next best thing; in 2000, they re-released Friedkin's frightening film in a revamped version that performed startlingly well at the box office. Lately, the studios have conjured up three exorcism movies. Sir Anthony Hopkins starred in the respectable hair-raiser "The Rite" back in the spring of 2011. Sadly, "The Rite" bore a PG-13 rating so it possessed little bite. The low-budget, Louisiana-set, yell-bent yarn "The Last Exorcism" preceded "The Rite" by several months, but it furnished more irony than chills. Now, Paramount Pictures has released writer & director William Brent Bell's micro-budget "The Devil Inside," another misguided entry in the pseudo-documentary, ‘found footage’ genre. Like “The Blair Witch Project,” “Cloverfield,” and the “Paranormal Activity” trilogy, "The Devil Inside" sets out to enhance its simulated verisimilitude by featuring a character who documents the action on video. Neither “The Blair Witch Project” nor “Cloverfield” exploited this approach with any success. Moreover, none of the subtlety and artistry which exemplified the "Paranormal Activity" epics augments this abrupt 87-minute gobbledygook. Worse, "The Devil Inside" regales us with lukewarm exorcism scenes and lackluster performances. You know an exorcism movie is in trouble when a barking dog provides its scariest moment.
Attractive Isabella Rossi (Brazilian-born actress Fernanda Andrade of "Why Am I Doing This?") is the daughter of Maria Rossi (Suzan Crowley of "Wild about Harry”) who went berserk back in 1989. "The Devil Inside" opens with Maria's cryptic phone conversation with a 911 operator and her confession that she killed two priests and a nun during an exorcism at her house. Afterward, we're treated to a behind-the-scenes peep at the gory crime scene; detectives wander through the blood-splattered residence in confidential footage mocked up to resemble grainy, decades old VHS tape. Ultimately, the court rules Maria is guilty by reason of insanity when she slew the three people. Eventually, Maria winds up heavily sedated in Rome, Italy, at the Centrino Hospital for the Criminally Insane. Director William Brent Bell fast-forwards to December 2009. A grown-up Isabella, who was only a child when her mother slaughtered the Catholics, hires documentary filmmaker Michael Schaefer (Ionut Grama of "The Whistleblower") to chronicle her mom's case. Basically, she wants to learn whether her mom is possessed by a demon or is mentally ill. Furthermore, she wants to convince herself that whatever happened to mom won’t happen to her. In other words, does demon possession or mental illness run in her family?
Isabella and Michael fly to Rome to visit Maria. While she is in the Eternal City, Isabella sits in on an exorcism lecture at a Catholic school. Afterward, she meets a couple of clerics, Father Ben Rawlings (Simon Quarterman of "The Scorpion King: Rise of a Warrior") and Father David Keane (Evan Helmuth of "Fever Pitch"), who are pretty liberal minded about exorcisms. If the Church refuses to countenance an exorcism, then this dynamic duo deliver the demons on the sly without the church’s blessing. Isabella wants to know more about exorcisms, and she is prepared to get a Ph.D. in demon possession. However, Rawlings advises Isabella to forgo any more exorcist classes. Instead, he invites her to witness an exorcist with David and him. Isabella's first exorcism occurs in the basement of a house in Rome. Rawlings and Keane use modern-day gadgets to support them. They outfit their patients with a heart monitor and photograph the size of the patient’s pupils to determine their actual condition. The young Italian girl, Rosa (Bonnie Morgan of “Piranha”), who they exorcise spews some profanity and has her period. At one point, she breaks her bonds and scuttles up a wall like a roach, but the priests cast out her demon. Isabella is now prepared to meet her mom.
Maria surprises Isabella when she reminds her daughter that an abortion she consented to years before won't put her in God's good graces. Naturally, Isabella is appalled by this revelation from somebody who hasn't seen her in twenty years. Later, the Fathers attach Maria to their gadgets, and she surprises them. Not only does she utter epithets in several tongues, but she also clobbers Father Rawlings and sends him flying across the room. Nothing that either Isabella or the Fathers discover about Maria convinces the Vatican to review Maria's case. As it turns out, the Vatican has long since washed its hands of Maria. This surprises our protagonists despite the fact that Maria killed three ordained exorcists back in 1989. Meantime, Father Keane experiences feelings of paranoia, and he has good reason. The devil inside Maria has taken residence up in him! Keane almost drowns an infant during a baptism. Later, he relieves a Roman cop of his firearm and finishes himself off. Of course, Michael is speechless. Unfortunately, this all this creates chaos of another kind which is more calculated to make you cackle rather than cringe.
"The Devil Inside" isn’t as scary as “The Exorcist.” The closest Bell's film comes to scary is creepy. Ultimately, however, creepy degenerates into campy. Nothing in this pedestrian horror movie will make you sleep with the lights on all night. The disclaimer at the outset that "the Vatican does not endorse this movie” shouldn’t surprise anybody. Worse, Bell and co-producer Michael Peterman wrap up everything far too quickly with an abrupt ending that sabotages any sense of closure. The last shot contains a website address (www.TheRossiFiles.com.)where all the answers are presumably available. Mind you, this is a terrible way to conclude a movie, but then “The Devil Inside” isn’t worth a Hail Mary.
CINEMATIC REVELATIONS allows me the luxury of writing, editing and archiving my film and television reviews. Some reviews appeared initially in "The Commercial Dispatch" and "The Planet Weekly" and then later in the comment archives at the Internet Movie Database. IMDB.COM, however, imposes a limit on both the number of words and the number of times that an author may revise their comments. I hope that anybody who peruses these expanded reviews will find them useful.
Monday, January 16, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
FILM REVIEW OF ''THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO" (2011)
If you saw both versions of “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” side by side, you could spot the differences between the 2009 Swedish original and the 2011 American remake. Nevertheless, the revelations in the other won’t be as surprising. “Fight Club” director David Fincher brings his obsession with serial killers with him to this top-drawer adaptation of Stieg Larsson’s international bestseller. Fincher scored his first major cinematic success with the Brad Pitt & Morgan Freeman crime mystery “Se7en” (1995) about a cunning serial killer, and he explored similar subject matter in “Zodiac” (2007) a film about the real-life murders in San Francisco which spawned Clint Eastwood’s “Dirty Harry” franchise. Considering that the gritty subject matter of Larsson’s novel concerns a man who rapes and then murders women, the pairing of “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” (**** out of ****) and Fincher seems ideal. Oscar winning “Schindler's List” scenarist Steven Zaillian, who received Oscar nods for “Awakenings” as well as “Gangs of New York,” brings his formidable skills to bear as the sole scribe. Indeed, little is amiss in the Fincher & Zaillian retread, except cat lovers probably won’t appreciate the headless feline that winds up on our hero’s door step. The cat was conspicuous by its absence in the Swedish version. Perhaps the biggest difference between the two films is the casting of Lisbeth Salander. Noomi Rapace registered brilliantly as the eponymous heroine in the original, but newcomer Rooney Mara is no slouch. Mara wears insanity as persuasively as her black, boot-polish Goth make-up and her punk rock coiffures. Any preference you have may boil down to your choice between either Ms. Rapace or Ms. Mara. Each deliver chilling performances, and the Lisbeth Salander character qualifies as a biggest milestone in the depiction of women in film since the female assassin in the 1990 French action yarn “La Femme Nikita.”
Aging Swedish business magnate Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer of “The Sound of Music”) fears that he has few years left. The mysterious disappearance of his niece Harriet is the one thing which has haunted him for 4o years. She vanished without a trace one day at a family reunion. Neither the authorities nor Henrik were ever able to find her. To add insult to injury, Henrik has received a framed picture of a flower annually on each birthday. Harriet gave him the first flower, but lately Henrik suspects that all subsequent flowers since she disappeared have been sent by Harriet’s killer. Henrik feels like he is being ridiculed and he has suffered from this torment long enough. He hires an illustrious Swedish political journalist who writes for the magazine “Millennium.” A reluctant Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig of “Casino Royale”) accepts Vanger’s job offer since he has just lost a highly publicized libel suit against a notorious Swedish billionaire investment banker, Hans-Erik Wennerström (Ulf Friberg of “Exit”), and the court settlement has wiped out his savings.
Henrik commissions Blomkvist to write his memoirs in part because he abhors the corrupt Wennerström. Moreover, he possesses files on Wennerström which will damage the billionaire’s reputation and he promises to give them to Blomkvist after he completes his assignment. What Blomkvist doesn’t know is that Henrik’s attorney, Dirch Frode (Steven Berkoff of “Octopussy”), has employed Milton Security to conduct a background check on Blomkvist. The individual who does the background check is a 23-year old girl, Lisbeth Salander (Rooney Mara of “Youth in Revolt”), and she leaves no stone unturned in her thorough investigation. Once Henrik hires Blomkvist, he explains that his family is pretty hideous bunch. Two of his brothers joined the Nazi Party in Sweden during World War II. Some don’t talk to each other even though they live in houses on an island linked to the mainland by a single bridge. Furthermore, Henrik suspects that one of them may have murdered poor Harriet. Henrik installs Blomkvist in a nearby cottage and provides him with every shred of evidence that the police relied on during their investigation of Harriet’s disappearance.
Later, things go awry when Henrik suffers a heart attack, and everybody but Frode expects him to die. At the hospital, some of Henrik’s relatives demand that Blomkvist be dismissed, but Martin Vanger (Stellan Skarsgård of “Thor”) convinces the family to allow Blomkvist to complete Henrik’s chronicle. Meantime, Lisbeth encounters her own woes when her guardian suffers a stroke, and the state replaces him. Lisbeth, it seems, has a life filled with tragedy. We learn that she burned her abusive father over eighty per cent of his body because he beat her mother without mercy. Since her assault on her father, Lisbeth has been in trouble and is now a ward of the state. The state transfers Lisbeth over to the villainous Bjurman (Yorick van Wageningen of “Soul Assassin”)who shows little sympathy to Lisbeth. He humiliates her with questions about her private life. Basically, they get off on the wrong foot, but Lisbeth manages to bring the evil Bjurman around to her way of thinking as suffering abuse at his hands. These scenes are the reason that "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" carries an R-rating for explicit sexuality.
Eventually, Blomkvist finds the mystery so overwhelming that he asks Frode for an assistant and Frode recommends Lisbeth. Together, they struggle to not only find clues but also to interpret those clues correctly. While Blomkvist interviews the Vanger family, Lisbeth performs the leg work. She turns out to be a genuis with computers, brazenly hacking into anybody's account to obtain information.
If anything differentiates the two films, the casting disgraced journalist Mikael Blomkvist does. Stockholm born actor Michael Nyqvist appears more believable in the original, but English born actor Daniel Craig holds his own in the remake. Actually, were it not for radical, off-beat character of Lisbeth, “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” would amount to little more than a complex European whodunit set in a scenic, snow-swept wonderland. In fact, it is Lisbeth who gives the film its lurid but gripping quality. She assumes a role of greater significance in the Swedish sequels and probably will in the American sequels. She emerges as a female Rambo with a no-nonsense attitude. If she were a cat, she would claw more often than purr. Although “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” clocks in at a lengthy 158 minutes, director David Fincher doesn’t squander a second. He knows the right moment to cut away from one scene to another to heighten suspense. Furthermore, despite the graphic crime scene photos and the misogyny, Fincher is careful enough to never rub our noses in it.
Aging Swedish business magnate Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer of “The Sound of Music”) fears that he has few years left. The mysterious disappearance of his niece Harriet is the one thing which has haunted him for 4o years. She vanished without a trace one day at a family reunion. Neither the authorities nor Henrik were ever able to find her. To add insult to injury, Henrik has received a framed picture of a flower annually on each birthday. Harriet gave him the first flower, but lately Henrik suspects that all subsequent flowers since she disappeared have been sent by Harriet’s killer. Henrik feels like he is being ridiculed and he has suffered from this torment long enough. He hires an illustrious Swedish political journalist who writes for the magazine “Millennium.” A reluctant Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig of “Casino Royale”) accepts Vanger’s job offer since he has just lost a highly publicized libel suit against a notorious Swedish billionaire investment banker, Hans-Erik Wennerström (Ulf Friberg of “Exit”), and the court settlement has wiped out his savings.
Henrik commissions Blomkvist to write his memoirs in part because he abhors the corrupt Wennerström. Moreover, he possesses files on Wennerström which will damage the billionaire’s reputation and he promises to give them to Blomkvist after he completes his assignment. What Blomkvist doesn’t know is that Henrik’s attorney, Dirch Frode (Steven Berkoff of “Octopussy”), has employed Milton Security to conduct a background check on Blomkvist. The individual who does the background check is a 23-year old girl, Lisbeth Salander (Rooney Mara of “Youth in Revolt”), and she leaves no stone unturned in her thorough investigation. Once Henrik hires Blomkvist, he explains that his family is pretty hideous bunch. Two of his brothers joined the Nazi Party in Sweden during World War II. Some don’t talk to each other even though they live in houses on an island linked to the mainland by a single bridge. Furthermore, Henrik suspects that one of them may have murdered poor Harriet. Henrik installs Blomkvist in a nearby cottage and provides him with every shred of evidence that the police relied on during their investigation of Harriet’s disappearance.
Later, things go awry when Henrik suffers a heart attack, and everybody but Frode expects him to die. At the hospital, some of Henrik’s relatives demand that Blomkvist be dismissed, but Martin Vanger (Stellan Skarsgård of “Thor”) convinces the family to allow Blomkvist to complete Henrik’s chronicle. Meantime, Lisbeth encounters her own woes when her guardian suffers a stroke, and the state replaces him. Lisbeth, it seems, has a life filled with tragedy. We learn that she burned her abusive father over eighty per cent of his body because he beat her mother without mercy. Since her assault on her father, Lisbeth has been in trouble and is now a ward of the state. The state transfers Lisbeth over to the villainous Bjurman (Yorick van Wageningen of “Soul Assassin”)who shows little sympathy to Lisbeth. He humiliates her with questions about her private life. Basically, they get off on the wrong foot, but Lisbeth manages to bring the evil Bjurman around to her way of thinking as suffering abuse at his hands. These scenes are the reason that "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" carries an R-rating for explicit sexuality.
Eventually, Blomkvist finds the mystery so overwhelming that he asks Frode for an assistant and Frode recommends Lisbeth. Together, they struggle to not only find clues but also to interpret those clues correctly. While Blomkvist interviews the Vanger family, Lisbeth performs the leg work. She turns out to be a genuis with computers, brazenly hacking into anybody's account to obtain information.
If anything differentiates the two films, the casting disgraced journalist Mikael Blomkvist does. Stockholm born actor Michael Nyqvist appears more believable in the original, but English born actor Daniel Craig holds his own in the remake. Actually, were it not for radical, off-beat character of Lisbeth, “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” would amount to little more than a complex European whodunit set in a scenic, snow-swept wonderland. In fact, it is Lisbeth who gives the film its lurid but gripping quality. She assumes a role of greater significance in the Swedish sequels and probably will in the American sequels. She emerges as a female Rambo with a no-nonsense attitude. If she were a cat, she would claw more often than purr. Although “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” clocks in at a lengthy 158 minutes, director David Fincher doesn’t squander a second. He knows the right moment to cut away from one scene to another to heighten suspense. Furthermore, despite the graphic crime scene photos and the misogyny, Fincher is careful enough to never rub our noses in it.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
FILM REVIEW OF ''THE DARKEST HOUR" (2010)
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Software designers Sean (Emile Hirsh of “Into the Wild”) and Ben (Max Minghella of “The Social Network”) have been pals since they met in elementary school. Their mothers served together on the same PTA, and Ben’s mom prompted her brainy son to associate with Sean. Now, Sean and Ben are business partners. They have developed a seminal social website that points out the best party places on the globe. Our heroes are flying into Moscow to pedal their software with the help of a shrewd Swedish businessman. They are about to land when smart aleck Sean tangles with a Russian flight attendant over the probability that his cell phone could disable the electronics of an aircraft and make it crash. No sooner do our internet entrepreneurs set foot in the conference where they plan to pitch their application to investors than their Swede partner Skyler (Joel Kinnaman of “Easy Money”) informs them he has stolen their idea. Summoning security, Skyler gives our guys the boot. Sean and Ben wind up in a bar to get sloshed when they encounter two American tourists, a photographer, Anne (Rachel Taylor of “Transformers”) and her assistant, Natalie (Olivia Thirlby of “Juno”), who have followed them on the Internet. Adding insult to injury, Skyler shows up at the same bar. No sooner have our heroes chugged a few drinks than the lights go out. Curiously, everybody ventures outside for a dazzling light show comparable to the aurora borealis. Objects that resemble shimmering golden jelly fish plummet to Earth by the millions. A Moscow cop probes one with his nightstick, and he disintegrates into a cloud of dust. The crowd scatters frantically as these jelly fish aliens explode other humans one-by-one. Sean, Ben, Anne, Natalie, and Skyler lock themselves inside a walk-in fridge at the bar.
Several days later they emerge to find Moscow a place of desolation. Sean and Ben are plundering a police cruiser for equipment when an alien spots them. Any time they pass electrical devices, such as lights, car horns, cell phones, etc., the aliens activate them. Our heroes conceal themselves under the cop car, and the alien miraculously misses them. Afterward, our heroes venture out only during daylight. Naturally, they find the American Embassy in shambles, but they spot a life in a nearby skyscraper. A young Russian teenager, Vika (newcomer Veronika Ozerova), has holed up with an eccentric middle-aged Russian engineer, Sergei (Date Atbakhtadze of “Wanted”), who has constructed a cage of metal bars and chains inside his apartment to shield their own human electrical fields from the aliens. Moreover, he has also designed a “Ghostbusters” type microwave gun which can stun the aliens. Sadly, Sergei manages to prove that his weapon works, but the batteries don’t hold a charge long enough. Meanwhile, our heroes escape with the gun and head for a Russian submarine in the Moscow River which is broadcasting an evacuation signal. Sean and company link up with a militia group. The militia look like a bunch of medieval warriors with 21st century firepower. They wear makeshift suits of chain mail which consist of keys and car tags. They have even decked a horse out in similar regalia. Reluctantly, the militia agrees to escort our heroes and heroines to a rendezvous with the sub despite the heavy presence of the invisible aliens. Predictably, not everybody survives the gauntlet of aliens between them and the submarine. Ultimately, our heroes learn how to kill the aliens.
The best thing about “The Darkest Hour” is the aliens. The worse thing is we’re told squat about them. These extraterrestrials never communicate with humanity in the form of either warnings or ultimatums. Worst, since no friendly aliens live amongst us as in “Cowboys and Aliens,” we have no clue about why they have invaded Earth. A Russian militia leader speculates that the aliens have come to deplete our mineral resources and kill us in the process. Once the heroes create their microwave weapons, Gorak gives us little more than a glimpse of these enigmatic aliens. Essentially, they look like black shiny skulls with loops of chains gyrating around them. They cannot see through windows, and they have trouble operating over bodies of water. Gorak and his writers take their subject matter far too seriously and never take advantage of the goofy way the aliens appear or the crazy way that humans drape themselves with metal objects to shield the electrical energy. The 3-D version of “The Darkest Hour” has little edge over the flat, 2-D version. Meantime, neither breaks any ground where alien invasion movies are concerned.
Friday, December 30, 2011
FILM REVIEW OF ''VOODOO MAN" (1944)
Prolific filmmaker William Beaudine and horror icon Bela Lugosi worked together on four films, and "Voodoo Man" (** out of ****) was the third. Previously, they collaborated on "Ghosts on the Loose" (1943) and "The Ape Man" (1943), while their final outing occurred on the madcap comedy "Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla" (1953). In "Voodoo Man," Lugosi plays a deluded doctor, Dr. Richard Marlowe, who wrestles with spousal issues similar to those in the 1942 chiller "The Corpse Vanishes." Whereas he endeavored to restore his wife's beauty in the latter movie, he struggles to restore his wife's life in "Voodoo Man." Actually, Evelyn (Ellen Hall of "Lumberjack") looks well-preserved to have been kaput for over two decades. She ambles around in a trance but looks as if she hasn't aged a day since she died.
Dr. Marlowe is in cahoots with a Mobil gas station owner, Nicholas (George Zucco of "The Black Raven") to bring his poor wife back to life. "Return of the Ape Man" scenarist Robert Charles doesn't bother to explain how Nicholas and Dr. Marlowe became so tight aside from their mutual love of all things voodoo. Indeed, many things are left up to our imagination in this modest little Monogram thriller. Nicholas helps Dr. Marlowe kidnap women when they pull into his station on Laurel Road for directions to Twin Falls. Nicholas' filling station is the only one for miles. After the gals cruise away, Nicolas calls Marlowe on the telephone and alerts him to their impending presence, and the sinister scientist dispatches his two half-witted dolts, Grego (Pat McKee of "Waterfront") and Toby (John Carradine of "Stagecoach"), to block the road with a sawhorse, creating an official looking detour so the female motorists will have to drive off the main drag onto a side road concealed by a movable hedge. Grego and Toby simply pull back a hedge to allow vehicles to pass.
Bt this point in "Voodoo Man," three women have disappeared without a trace, and the authorities are completely baffled. Moreover, Marlowe also possesses an ingenious device which enables him to shut down the engine of an automobile. While the helpless woman sits mystified in her stalled car, Grego and Toby sneak up, seize her, and then usher her down into a tunnel into Marlowe's underground laboratory. Marlowe decks the women out in flowing white dresses and keeps them locked up in closets. Marlowe maintains them in a state of hypnosis. Later, during a ritualistic ceremony, Nicholas utters a chant called the Ramboona so they can transfer the spirit of the living girl into Evelyn. Unfortunately, Marlowe and his minions have not been able to get the perfect match for Evelyn.
The Banner Motion Picture Company wants to capitalize on these incidents and produce a movie about these vanishing women, but scriptwriter Ralph Dawson (Tod Andrews of "Hang'em High") refuses to pen the screenplay. Instead, he plans to get married and take a two week honeymoon. Dawson drives off for Twin Falls and pulls into Nicholas' gas station to tank up. Ralph refuses to buy a can of car polish and gets so frustrated with the well-meaning attendant, Sam (Ralph Littlefield), that Sam doesn't get a chance to pump the six gallons of fuel into his car that Ralph has paid for. Consequently, Ralph runs out of gas, but he encounters one of his future wife's bridesmaids, Stella Saunders (Louise Currie) who gives him a lift. Predictably, they see the detour sawhorse and take the wrong road. Stella's car mysteriously stops operating and Ralph goes off to search for a house. While Ralph is banging on the door to Dr. Marlowe's house, Grego and Toby abduct Stella. Ralph feels doubly frustrated when he finds both Stella and her car gone. An attempt to transfer Stella's life into Evelyn fails. Things go awry when Toby lets Stella escape, and the sheriff picks her as she wanders down on the highway. The sheriff takes Stella to Ralph's fiancée's house. Later, Marlowe discovers Stella's disappearance and rushes to Betty's house to ensure her silence. When they aren't watching Stella, Nicholas chants and Marlowe is able to bring Stella back to his secluded residence.
Eventually, Marlowe and Nicholas use their voodoo powers to attract Betty (Wanda McKay) who is poised to marry Ralph. Nicholas conjures up a chant that works so well that they are able lure Betty out to their roadside detour. In fact, Betty drives her car out to Laurel Road. Ralph convinces a motorist to give him a lift and they drive out to the sight of the detour. Meantime, the Sheriff (Henry Hall) and his reluctant deputy Elmer (Dan White) have grown suspicious about the good doctor and decide to break into Marlowe's house. Earlier, after the motorist had dropped Ralph off, he tried to intervene, but Grego dropped him stone cold in his tracks with a single blow. Ironically, Betty turns out to be the perfect match for Evelyn, and Dr. Marlowe achieves his long sought-after dream, only to have the sheriff barge in on them. Marlowe threatens the lawman with a knife, and the sheriff shoots him once. During his final dying moments, Marlowe learns that the ritual using Betty has worked. When Marlowe dies, not only does Evelyn finally bite the dust, but the four girls are released from their hypnotic trances.
Afterward, Ralph submits a screenplay about his adventures with Marlowe and calls it "Voodoo Man." Nobody takes anything seriously because the producer asks Ralph about the ideal actor to play the role of the mad scientist, and Ralph recommends Bela Lugosi for the role. Clocking in at a trim 62 minutes, "Voodoo Man" is as brisk as it is elemental, but there isn't a shred of horror in it. John Carradine takes top honors as one of Dr. Marlowe's slow-witted goons who admires the women. George Zucco is good, too, as Marlowe's chief conspirator. "Voodoo Man" should have been called "Voodoo Men." Lugosi appears in an evening suit with a goatee, but he isn't in the least menacing. In fact, he seems rather urbane. Again, the Richard Charles screenplay is lean on details so we know little about why Marlowe has a house in the woods or how his wife died. Nothing memorable occurs aside from the oddball voodoo ceremony. Nevertheless, Lugosi's presence is what makes "Voodoo Man" worth watching
Dr. Marlowe is in cahoots with a Mobil gas station owner, Nicholas (George Zucco of "The Black Raven") to bring his poor wife back to life. "Return of the Ape Man" scenarist Robert Charles doesn't bother to explain how Nicholas and Dr. Marlowe became so tight aside from their mutual love of all things voodoo. Indeed, many things are left up to our imagination in this modest little Monogram thriller. Nicholas helps Dr. Marlowe kidnap women when they pull into his station on Laurel Road for directions to Twin Falls. Nicholas' filling station is the only one for miles. After the gals cruise away, Nicolas calls Marlowe on the telephone and alerts him to their impending presence, and the sinister scientist dispatches his two half-witted dolts, Grego (Pat McKee of "Waterfront") and Toby (John Carradine of "Stagecoach"), to block the road with a sawhorse, creating an official looking detour so the female motorists will have to drive off the main drag onto a side road concealed by a movable hedge. Grego and Toby simply pull back a hedge to allow vehicles to pass.
Bt this point in "Voodoo Man," three women have disappeared without a trace, and the authorities are completely baffled. Moreover, Marlowe also possesses an ingenious device which enables him to shut down the engine of an automobile. While the helpless woman sits mystified in her stalled car, Grego and Toby sneak up, seize her, and then usher her down into a tunnel into Marlowe's underground laboratory. Marlowe decks the women out in flowing white dresses and keeps them locked up in closets. Marlowe maintains them in a state of hypnosis. Later, during a ritualistic ceremony, Nicholas utters a chant called the Ramboona so they can transfer the spirit of the living girl into Evelyn. Unfortunately, Marlowe and his minions have not been able to get the perfect match for Evelyn.
The Banner Motion Picture Company wants to capitalize on these incidents and produce a movie about these vanishing women, but scriptwriter Ralph Dawson (Tod Andrews of "Hang'em High") refuses to pen the screenplay. Instead, he plans to get married and take a two week honeymoon. Dawson drives off for Twin Falls and pulls into Nicholas' gas station to tank up. Ralph refuses to buy a can of car polish and gets so frustrated with the well-meaning attendant, Sam (Ralph Littlefield), that Sam doesn't get a chance to pump the six gallons of fuel into his car that Ralph has paid for. Consequently, Ralph runs out of gas, but he encounters one of his future wife's bridesmaids, Stella Saunders (Louise Currie) who gives him a lift. Predictably, they see the detour sawhorse and take the wrong road. Stella's car mysteriously stops operating and Ralph goes off to search for a house. While Ralph is banging on the door to Dr. Marlowe's house, Grego and Toby abduct Stella. Ralph feels doubly frustrated when he finds both Stella and her car gone. An attempt to transfer Stella's life into Evelyn fails. Things go awry when Toby lets Stella escape, and the sheriff picks her as she wanders down on the highway. The sheriff takes Stella to Ralph's fiancée's house. Later, Marlowe discovers Stella's disappearance and rushes to Betty's house to ensure her silence. When they aren't watching Stella, Nicholas chants and Marlowe is able to bring Stella back to his secluded residence.
Eventually, Marlowe and Nicholas use their voodoo powers to attract Betty (Wanda McKay) who is poised to marry Ralph. Nicholas conjures up a chant that works so well that they are able lure Betty out to their roadside detour. In fact, Betty drives her car out to Laurel Road. Ralph convinces a motorist to give him a lift and they drive out to the sight of the detour. Meantime, the Sheriff (Henry Hall) and his reluctant deputy Elmer (Dan White) have grown suspicious about the good doctor and decide to break into Marlowe's house. Earlier, after the motorist had dropped Ralph off, he tried to intervene, but Grego dropped him stone cold in his tracks with a single blow. Ironically, Betty turns out to be the perfect match for Evelyn, and Dr. Marlowe achieves his long sought-after dream, only to have the sheriff barge in on them. Marlowe threatens the lawman with a knife, and the sheriff shoots him once. During his final dying moments, Marlowe learns that the ritual using Betty has worked. When Marlowe dies, not only does Evelyn finally bite the dust, but the four girls are released from their hypnotic trances.
Afterward, Ralph submits a screenplay about his adventures with Marlowe and calls it "Voodoo Man." Nobody takes anything seriously because the producer asks Ralph about the ideal actor to play the role of the mad scientist, and Ralph recommends Bela Lugosi for the role. Clocking in at a trim 62 minutes, "Voodoo Man" is as brisk as it is elemental, but there isn't a shred of horror in it. John Carradine takes top honors as one of Dr. Marlowe's slow-witted goons who admires the women. George Zucco is good, too, as Marlowe's chief conspirator. "Voodoo Man" should have been called "Voodoo Men." Lugosi appears in an evening suit with a goatee, but he isn't in the least menacing. In fact, he seems rather urbane. Again, the Richard Charles screenplay is lean on details so we know little about why Marlowe has a house in the woods or how his wife died. Nothing memorable occurs aside from the oddball voodoo ceremony. Nevertheless, Lugosi's presence is what makes "Voodoo Man" worth watching
Friday, December 23, 2011
FILM REVIEW OF ''ALIEN ARMAGEDDON" (2011)
"Battlespace" writer & director Neil Johnson’s derivative, low-budget science fiction thriller “Alien Armageddon” (* out of ****) chronicles a breed of Martian invaders, ‘the Nephilim,’ who dominate planet Earth for 67 historic days. These hostile intruders establish their headquarters in Los Angeles after subjugating the Earth and then rely on our own scientists to modify our DNA so that we become fodder for them. You see, these ravenous monsters had to abandon their famine-stricken world. Actually, the villainous Nephilim have been quietly infiltrating Earth for many decades, acquiring knowledge about our character and culture. The computer generated special effects imagery of the alien armada during the first ten minutes looks like something out of a black & white graphic novel. This fleet of spacecraft, which resemble naval vessels, hover as if they were vultures over every major city. The lackluster battle sequences are comprised of ersatz mushroom cloud explosions and flashes inserted in photographs of California and other overseas locales. Johnson shakes his camera to give the fake explosions some impact. The Nephilim infantry look like distant cousins of the "Star Wars" robot C3PO. Decked out in metal football shoulder pads and breast-plates bristling with hoses, these soldiers shoulder deadly automatic weapons but they aren't too bright. When humans are struck by Nephilim ordnance, they dissolve into a splatter of blood and momentarily obstruct the camera lens. Not surprisingly, the nefarious extraterrestrials conquer and enslave humanity by the forty-fourth day or roughly the first half-hour of the action. Some of the treacherous humans, desperate to survive, turn into quislings, while the incarcerated humans are fed a diet of contaminated food which makes them edible to the aliens.
Johnson begins the action with a quotation from the Book of Enoch (10:9-10:15) out of the Apocrypha. "The Lord said to Gabriel: Proceed against the bastards, and the reprobates, and the sons of the fornicators, and destroy the sons of the Watchers from amongst men . . . bind them for seventy generations . . . Semyaza, the leader, will be destroyed with them. And destroy the Nephilim for they have wronged men." Following this quotation, Johnson employs horror icon Christopher Lee to provide some dramatic voice-over narration: "In ages past, the Nephilim Empire ruled the Earth, but they fell from grace. Once their slaves, Humanity rose up and defeated their gods. The Nephilim were purged from the earth and banished to the darkness. For centuries, they watched and waited. The Nephilim Empire would one day rise again." Afterward, Johnson introduces the hero, Cowboy (Don Scribner of "Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity"), who wears hair long and speaks through a grizzled beard. Cowboy is a convict at Folsom State Prison where he is serving time for the murder of his son and twenty-eight passengers on a bus. When a television reporter asks why he killed his son, Cowboy replies cryptically, "Boy had to die. He was cancer." Johnson cross cuts between this TV interview with Cowboy and the blitzkreig attack launched by the Nephilim against Earth. Later, dressed in an orange prison jump suit, Cowboy appears without explanation outside Folsom and takes the keys to an SUV from the corpse of its driver.
Our heroine is a feisty Jewish red-head, Jodie Elliot (British actress Katharine McEwan of "Sinners"), who operates a printing shop in contemporary Los Angeles. She is contending with a disgruntled customers who wants a discount when the alien ships appear over the city. The customer describes the ships erroneously as hot-air balloons, but Jodie fears the worst is about to happen. After the aliens have taken over Los Angeles and built a wall around the metropolis, Jodie joins an underground resistance movement. Eventually, the Nephilim ferret out her hiding place and capture her. Jodie shares a skyscraper prison cell with an African-American soldier, Markus (Benjamin J. Cain Jr. of "Dogma") and white, Catholic, B-2 Spirit bomber pilot Sheen (William David Tulin of "KingBreaker") who nuked Chicago before the Nephilim could make it their headquarters. An electronic force field substitutes for iron bars on the entrance of their cell, and she suffers a jolt when she tries to penetrate it. They dine on slop out of black plastic buckets and relieve themselves into a small foot locker. The meat that they are given is so vile that they puke it up, but this is all they are allowed to eat.
Meantime, Cowboy links up with another resistance unit. He sports a duster now with a Stetson riding low on his forehead. The Nephilim capture him after a firefight in the desert. Not long afterward, he winds up in the same cell with Jodie. Our heroine wants desperately to break out and rejoin her daughter who resides in the small town of Little Rock, California. She watches in horror as her cell mates are dragged off to become brunch. At one point, Jodie manages to escape briefly and witnesses a harrowing scene when a pregnant female inmate strapped down to a bed gives birth to several chunks of flesh. All along, two scientists Franci (Rochelle Vallese of "Scar") and Dr. Brenna (Julia Parker of "Girl Crazy") have been collaborating with the Nephilim to make humanity more palatable for their extraterrestrial taste buds. Once the Nephilim have used Franci, they stick her in the same cell with our heroes. The Nephilim take Markus and feed him to a flesh eating zombie like creature. Jodie, Franci, and Cowboy escape when Jodie stages a bout of illness. The girls head for Little Rock, but Jodie doesn’t find her daughter. Cowboy later rejoins them after commandeering an alien interceptor aircraft.
Meantime, Franci injects Jodie with some strange serum so that she becomes a bio-medical weapon against the Nephilim. Franci rhapsodizes about the pleasures of masquerading as a human and all the feelings that life has evoked for her. Predictably, she dies. Eventually, humanity triumphs over the Martian invaders. Before this occurs, we get to see revolting shots of giant, beady, orange slugs with pincers gnawing on the flesh and bones of decaying humans. Before Franci dispatches Jodie on her sacrificial mission to save mankind, they indulging in a lingering lesbian lip-lock. Jodie neither pukes nor repels Franci. Johnson concludes with another quotation from Enoch 16:1. "And the death of the Nephilim, and wherever the spirits have left their bodies, their flesh will be destroyed, before the judgement. They will be banished until the Day of the Great Consumption and this also will stand against the Watchers and all those who are impious."
"Alien Armageddon" qualifies as an abominable opus with shoddy storytelling, sketchy characters, second-rate special effects, subpar dialogue, and shallow acting. Little about this below-average sci-fi saga is either groundbreaking or sensational. The occasional clashes between Nephilim infantry and earthlings enliven the exposition heavy narrative, and the few revelations in this predictable, standard-issue invasion flick lack impact. The Nephilim chieftain looks menacing enough with his cadaverous, predatory complexion, but Johnson doesn't permit him adequate screen time to create more than a fleeting impression. Basically, this sci-fi actioneer spends more time on Earth than in the heavens. Clocking in at 95 interminable minutes, “Alien Armageddon” makes “Wing Commander” look like “Star Wars.”
Johnson begins the action with a quotation from the Book of Enoch (10:9-10:15) out of the Apocrypha. "The Lord said to Gabriel: Proceed against the bastards, and the reprobates, and the sons of the fornicators, and destroy the sons of the Watchers from amongst men . . . bind them for seventy generations . . . Semyaza, the leader, will be destroyed with them. And destroy the Nephilim for they have wronged men." Following this quotation, Johnson employs horror icon Christopher Lee to provide some dramatic voice-over narration: "In ages past, the Nephilim Empire ruled the Earth, but they fell from grace. Once their slaves, Humanity rose up and defeated their gods. The Nephilim were purged from the earth and banished to the darkness. For centuries, they watched and waited. The Nephilim Empire would one day rise again." Afterward, Johnson introduces the hero, Cowboy (Don Scribner of "Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity"), who wears hair long and speaks through a grizzled beard. Cowboy is a convict at Folsom State Prison where he is serving time for the murder of his son and twenty-eight passengers on a bus. When a television reporter asks why he killed his son, Cowboy replies cryptically, "Boy had to die. He was cancer." Johnson cross cuts between this TV interview with Cowboy and the blitzkreig attack launched by the Nephilim against Earth. Later, dressed in an orange prison jump suit, Cowboy appears without explanation outside Folsom and takes the keys to an SUV from the corpse of its driver.
Our heroine is a feisty Jewish red-head, Jodie Elliot (British actress Katharine McEwan of "Sinners"), who operates a printing shop in contemporary Los Angeles. She is contending with a disgruntled customers who wants a discount when the alien ships appear over the city. The customer describes the ships erroneously as hot-air balloons, but Jodie fears the worst is about to happen. After the aliens have taken over Los Angeles and built a wall around the metropolis, Jodie joins an underground resistance movement. Eventually, the Nephilim ferret out her hiding place and capture her. Jodie shares a skyscraper prison cell with an African-American soldier, Markus (Benjamin J. Cain Jr. of "Dogma") and white, Catholic, B-2 Spirit bomber pilot Sheen (William David Tulin of "KingBreaker") who nuked Chicago before the Nephilim could make it their headquarters. An electronic force field substitutes for iron bars on the entrance of their cell, and she suffers a jolt when she tries to penetrate it. They dine on slop out of black plastic buckets and relieve themselves into a small foot locker. The meat that they are given is so vile that they puke it up, but this is all they are allowed to eat.
Meantime, Cowboy links up with another resistance unit. He sports a duster now with a Stetson riding low on his forehead. The Nephilim capture him after a firefight in the desert. Not long afterward, he winds up in the same cell with Jodie. Our heroine wants desperately to break out and rejoin her daughter who resides in the small town of Little Rock, California. She watches in horror as her cell mates are dragged off to become brunch. At one point, Jodie manages to escape briefly and witnesses a harrowing scene when a pregnant female inmate strapped down to a bed gives birth to several chunks of flesh. All along, two scientists Franci (Rochelle Vallese of "Scar") and Dr. Brenna (Julia Parker of "Girl Crazy") have been collaborating with the Nephilim to make humanity more palatable for their extraterrestrial taste buds. Once the Nephilim have used Franci, they stick her in the same cell with our heroes. The Nephilim take Markus and feed him to a flesh eating zombie like creature. Jodie, Franci, and Cowboy escape when Jodie stages a bout of illness. The girls head for Little Rock, but Jodie doesn’t find her daughter. Cowboy later rejoins them after commandeering an alien interceptor aircraft.
Meantime, Franci injects Jodie with some strange serum so that she becomes a bio-medical weapon against the Nephilim. Franci rhapsodizes about the pleasures of masquerading as a human and all the feelings that life has evoked for her. Predictably, she dies. Eventually, humanity triumphs over the Martian invaders. Before this occurs, we get to see revolting shots of giant, beady, orange slugs with pincers gnawing on the flesh and bones of decaying humans. Before Franci dispatches Jodie on her sacrificial mission to save mankind, they indulging in a lingering lesbian lip-lock. Jodie neither pukes nor repels Franci. Johnson concludes with another quotation from Enoch 16:1. "And the death of the Nephilim, and wherever the spirits have left their bodies, their flesh will be destroyed, before the judgement. They will be banished until the Day of the Great Consumption and this also will stand against the Watchers and all those who are impious."
"Alien Armageddon" qualifies as an abominable opus with shoddy storytelling, sketchy characters, second-rate special effects, subpar dialogue, and shallow acting. Little about this below-average sci-fi saga is either groundbreaking or sensational. The occasional clashes between Nephilim infantry and earthlings enliven the exposition heavy narrative, and the few revelations in this predictable, standard-issue invasion flick lack impact. The Nephilim chieftain looks menacing enough with his cadaverous, predatory complexion, but Johnson doesn't permit him adequate screen time to create more than a fleeting impression. Basically, this sci-fi actioneer spends more time on Earth than in the heavens. Clocking in at 95 interminable minutes, “Alien Armageddon” makes “Wing Commander” look like “Star Wars.”
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
FILM REVIEW OF ''SHERLOCK HOLMES: A GAME OF SHADOWS" (2011)
According to The Guinness World Records, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s illustrious literary detective Sherlock Holmes ranks as “the most portrayed movie character” in cinematic history. Indeed, Hollywood has been shooting movies about Sherlock Holmes since the initial one-reeler, “Sherlock Holmes Baffled,” appeared in 1900, as a 30-second silent epic. Since then a number of actors have taken up residence at 221 B Baker Street, ranging from the most vintage, Basil Rathbone during the 1940s, to the most bohemian, Robert Downey, Jr., who received a Golden Globe for his performance in director Guy Ritchie’s “Sherlock Holmes” (2009). Mind you, the Holmes character has made an enviable reputation for himself on television, too. Actor Jeremy Britt took top honors with the definitive interpretation of the notable consulting detective throughout 41 episodes of the Granada Television series. Most recently, the BBC-TV revived Doyle’s gumshoe for the contemporary series “Sherlock” with Benedict Cumberbatch making his deductions amid a modern-day London. Clearly, with as many as 211 movies featuring him, Sherlock Holmes qualifies as an enduring protagonist whose eternal popularity has not diminished in over a century.
Meanwhile, “Lethal Weapon” producer Joel Silver and Ritchie have brought back Holmes for a superior sequel, “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” (**** out of ****), and “Paper Man” scenarists Michele and Kieran Mulroney have pitted him against his most diabolical nemesis, that Napoleon of Crime, Professor James Moriarty. Nothing less than the fate of Western civilization hangs in the balance during this taut 129 minute melodrama which sends Dr. Watson with our eponymous protagonist globetrotting across Europe after “Sherlock Holmes” had confined them to London. Although Lord Blackwood proved an audacious adversary in “Sherlock Holmes,” Moriarty emerges as a far more stimulating opponent in a sequel that surpasses its predecessor. This Moriarty may be the best in any Holmes adventure. Ritchie and the Mulroneys have put the Victorian Era sleuth through the paces with several exciting sequences, including a bullet-riddled shoot-out on a railway train to a challenging chess match in a scenic castle in Switzerland posed on a waterfall. Happily, “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” preserves the formula of its predecessor in every detail and character, not only replaying the ingenious Holmes-O-Vision fisticuffs scenes but also ushering in new characters, such as Holmes’ brilliant elder brother Mycroft. My only complaint about this otherwise tour-de-force mystery thriller is the short shrift given to Holmes’ love interest, Irene Adler, who doesn’t garner her share of screen time.
“Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” takes place in the year 1891 as anarchy threatens to engulf Europe and ignite war between France and Germany. The press speculates either nationalists or anarchists are behind the violence, but Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey, Jr. of “Iron Man”) believes Moriarty is to blame. Indeed, Moriarty is to blame! No sooner do his unwitting henchmen carry out a piece of his elaborate puzzle of murder and mayhem than a dishonorably discharged British sniper, Colonel Sebastian Moran (Paul Anderson of “A Lonely Place to Die”), kills them with extreme prejudice. Essentially, the sequel picks up where its predecessor more or less off as Dr. Watson is poised to wed Mary (Kelly Reilly of “Pride & Prejudice”) despite Holmes’ indefatigable efforts to derail matrimony. Holmes and Watson visit a London night club where Holmes was supposed to throw Watson’s stag party. Instead, Holmes runs into his brother Mycroft (Stephen Fry of “St. Trinian's”) and leaves a disgruntled Watson to gamble while he meets a gypsy woman, Madam Simza Heron (Noomi Rapace of the Swedish film “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”), who has been searching for her long lost brother named Rene. No sooner does Holmes read her fortune than a smelly Cossack warrior attacks them in an exhilarating scene. Later, after they escape, Holmes meets Moriarty at the university where he teaches mathematics. This is Holmes’ first encounter with Moriarty, and Moriarty tells him he plans to kill both Watson and his wife Mary on their honeymoon. Naturally, Holmes sets out to thwart him and all hell breaks loose.
Oscar-nominated actor Robert Downey, Jr., has another field day playing Sherlock Holmes. Some of his disguises make him virtually invisible. What may irritate die-hard Baker Street regulars are Downey’s undignified antics, particularly when he appears in drag to thwart the villains on the railroad out to murder Watson and his wife. Downey’s funniest scene has Holmes straddling a Shetland pony to the hilarious strains of Ennio Morricone’s music from the Clint Eastwood & Shirley MacLaine oater “Two Mules for Sister Sara.” Undoubtedly, Downey’s best dramatic scene occurs when he crosses analytical swords with Jared Harris’ Machiavellian Professor Moriarty. Mind you, Downey displays more personality than Harris. Nevertheless, Harris makes an undeniably menacing impression with a grand scheme to start a war. Jude Law reprises his role as Dr. Watson, and the chemistry between Law and Downey is still as charismatic as ever. Watson isn’t the bumbling oaf that Nigel Bruce was in the memorable Basil Rathbone outings in the 1940s. The mustached Law is as sharp with his wardrobe as he is with his revolver. For that matter, he is pretty good with military artillery. As Watson’s future wife, Kelly Reilly acquires more screen time here. Other supporting characters from the original, such as Inspector Lestrade (Eddie Marsan) and Holmes’ landlady Mrs. Hudson (Geraldine James), are back. One of producer Joel Silver’s better characteristics is his predilection for retaining the same characters as well as actors as he did in his quartet of “Lethal Weapon” blockbusters.
As usual, despite his revisionist handling of Holmes as a knuckle-smashing action hero, Ritchie makes sure that this lavishly produced thriller never wears out its welcome. Holmes and Watson find themselves up to their respective necks in danger. Happily, Ritchie and the Mulroney never fall back on the formulaic endangered woman plot with regard to Madam Simza and her part in the action. Unlike the first Ritchie “Holmes,” the sequel boasts a couple of tragic moments, but they don’t slow down the pace. Thanks to a lot of gorgeous computer-generated imagery and “Sommersby” lenser Philippe Rousselot photography, everything looks convincingly Victorian. Nothing about “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” is merely elementary, but everything is wholly entertaining.
Meanwhile, “Lethal Weapon” producer Joel Silver and Ritchie have brought back Holmes for a superior sequel, “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” (**** out of ****), and “Paper Man” scenarists Michele and Kieran Mulroney have pitted him against his most diabolical nemesis, that Napoleon of Crime, Professor James Moriarty. Nothing less than the fate of Western civilization hangs in the balance during this taut 129 minute melodrama which sends Dr. Watson with our eponymous protagonist globetrotting across Europe after “Sherlock Holmes” had confined them to London. Although Lord Blackwood proved an audacious adversary in “Sherlock Holmes,” Moriarty emerges as a far more stimulating opponent in a sequel that surpasses its predecessor. This Moriarty may be the best in any Holmes adventure. Ritchie and the Mulroneys have put the Victorian Era sleuth through the paces with several exciting sequences, including a bullet-riddled shoot-out on a railway train to a challenging chess match in a scenic castle in Switzerland posed on a waterfall. Happily, “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” preserves the formula of its predecessor in every detail and character, not only replaying the ingenious Holmes-O-Vision fisticuffs scenes but also ushering in new characters, such as Holmes’ brilliant elder brother Mycroft. My only complaint about this otherwise tour-de-force mystery thriller is the short shrift given to Holmes’ love interest, Irene Adler, who doesn’t garner her share of screen time.
“Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” takes place in the year 1891 as anarchy threatens to engulf Europe and ignite war between France and Germany. The press speculates either nationalists or anarchists are behind the violence, but Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey, Jr. of “Iron Man”) believes Moriarty is to blame. Indeed, Moriarty is to blame! No sooner do his unwitting henchmen carry out a piece of his elaborate puzzle of murder and mayhem than a dishonorably discharged British sniper, Colonel Sebastian Moran (Paul Anderson of “A Lonely Place to Die”), kills them with extreme prejudice. Essentially, the sequel picks up where its predecessor more or less off as Dr. Watson is poised to wed Mary (Kelly Reilly of “Pride & Prejudice”) despite Holmes’ indefatigable efforts to derail matrimony. Holmes and Watson visit a London night club where Holmes was supposed to throw Watson’s stag party. Instead, Holmes runs into his brother Mycroft (Stephen Fry of “St. Trinian's”) and leaves a disgruntled Watson to gamble while he meets a gypsy woman, Madam Simza Heron (Noomi Rapace of the Swedish film “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”), who has been searching for her long lost brother named Rene. No sooner does Holmes read her fortune than a smelly Cossack warrior attacks them in an exhilarating scene. Later, after they escape, Holmes meets Moriarty at the university where he teaches mathematics. This is Holmes’ first encounter with Moriarty, and Moriarty tells him he plans to kill both Watson and his wife Mary on their honeymoon. Naturally, Holmes sets out to thwart him and all hell breaks loose.
Oscar-nominated actor Robert Downey, Jr., has another field day playing Sherlock Holmes. Some of his disguises make him virtually invisible. What may irritate die-hard Baker Street regulars are Downey’s undignified antics, particularly when he appears in drag to thwart the villains on the railroad out to murder Watson and his wife. Downey’s funniest scene has Holmes straddling a Shetland pony to the hilarious strains of Ennio Morricone’s music from the Clint Eastwood & Shirley MacLaine oater “Two Mules for Sister Sara.” Undoubtedly, Downey’s best dramatic scene occurs when he crosses analytical swords with Jared Harris’ Machiavellian Professor Moriarty. Mind you, Downey displays more personality than Harris. Nevertheless, Harris makes an undeniably menacing impression with a grand scheme to start a war. Jude Law reprises his role as Dr. Watson, and the chemistry between Law and Downey is still as charismatic as ever. Watson isn’t the bumbling oaf that Nigel Bruce was in the memorable Basil Rathbone outings in the 1940s. The mustached Law is as sharp with his wardrobe as he is with his revolver. For that matter, he is pretty good with military artillery. As Watson’s future wife, Kelly Reilly acquires more screen time here. Other supporting characters from the original, such as Inspector Lestrade (Eddie Marsan) and Holmes’ landlady Mrs. Hudson (Geraldine James), are back. One of producer Joel Silver’s better characteristics is his predilection for retaining the same characters as well as actors as he did in his quartet of “Lethal Weapon” blockbusters.
As usual, despite his revisionist handling of Holmes as a knuckle-smashing action hero, Ritchie makes sure that this lavishly produced thriller never wears out its welcome. Holmes and Watson find themselves up to their respective necks in danger. Happily, Ritchie and the Mulroney never fall back on the formulaic endangered woman plot with regard to Madam Simza and her part in the action. Unlike the first Ritchie “Holmes,” the sequel boasts a couple of tragic moments, but they don’t slow down the pace. Thanks to a lot of gorgeous computer-generated imagery and “Sommersby” lenser Philippe Rousselot photography, everything looks convincingly Victorian. Nothing about “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows” is merely elementary, but everything is wholly entertaining.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
FILM REVIEW OF ''THE SITTER" (2011)
Comedian Jonah Hill usually plays a goof-off in a group of guys. He appeared in director Judd Apatow's "Knocked Up" as well as "Funny People" as part of a bunch of guys. Although Hill took top billing in "Superbad," Michael Cera attracted the lion's share of attention in that Judd Apatow produced teen comedy. Hill shared the screen with Russell Brand in another Judd Apatow produced laffer "Get Him to the Greek," but Brand dominated that comedy with his hopelessly eccentric persona. Now, in "Pineapple Express" director David Gordon Greene's "The Sitter," Jonah Hill plays top dog. Not only does he star as the protagonist, but he also is the butt of most of the humorous jokes.
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Anybody who has seen the wonderful Christopher Columbus comedy "Adventures in Babysitting" (1987) might discern the palatable resemblance between "The Sitter"
(**** out of ****) and the former film. Freshman scribes Brian Gatewood and Alessandro Tanaka must have seen "Adventures in Babysitting," too, because Gordon's film involves a similar sequence of events. Circumstances compel our reluctant hero to serve as a babysitter. Later, he finds himself trapped between a rock and a hard place. Meaning, our hero must break rule number one of babysitting and leave the house. He must also break rule number two and take the children with him. Next, he breaks rule number three; he endangers their lives when he takes them in harm's way. The pay-off is that the kids learn some of life's harsh truths and experience a change in attitude about themselves. In fact, everybody, including the hero, learn something about themselves that they didn't know. The resemblance between the Chris Columbus movie and David Gordon Greene's movie ends at this point. "Adventures in Babysitting" qualified a mild PG-13 that skirted an R-rating, but kids and adults both can enjoy it. On the contrary, "The Sitter" deserves its R-rating for all of its profanity,
sexuality, and intense situations.
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The wild and chaotic evening which ensues is one of the most traumatic in Noah's life. Everything looks pretty simple until he encounters the Pedulla kids. First, 9-year-old Blithe (newcomer Landry Bender) wants to grow up to become a media 'celebutante' like either Paris Hilton oLindsay Lohan. She copious amounts of make-up. Second, Blithe's 13-year old brother Slater (Max Records of "Where the Wild Things Are") suffers from a sexual identity crisis. As a result, his psychiatrist keeps him heavily medicated. What Max refuses to recognize is he is a latent gay tendencies. The Pedulla's third child is an El Salvadoran refugee, Rodrigo (newcomer Kevin Hernandez) with an anger management problem. Whereas Slater is mild-manner and repressed, Rodrigo is a full-tilt anus who loves to toy with explosives. Rodrigo's favorite pastime is tossing cherry bombs into toilets. Rodrigo isn't happy because he keeps getting foisted off on one foster home after another because of his
destructive antics.
No sooner have the Pedullas and Noah's mom embarked on their dinner date than Marisa phones Noah. She informs him she is finally prepared to have sex with him if he can score some coke for a friend. Impulsively, Noah throws caution to the wind. He piles the Pedulla children into their mini-van and cruises into New York City with them to buy cocaine from a psychotic dealer, Karl (Sam Rockwell of "Cowboys and Aliens"), who surrounds himself with muscle-bound bodybuilders. Rodrigo purloins one of Karl's prized dinosaur eggs packed with $10-thousand worth of coke. When Rodrigo and Noah tangle in a tug of war over the egg, they crack it and cocaine covers Noah's face. Later, a group of African-American gangstas steal the Pedullas' mini-van that Noah commandeered for their Manhattan melodrama. Now, Karl wants to ice Noah if our hero doesn't pay for the cocaine, and Noah still wants to hook-up with Maria. Essentially, "The Sitter" constitutes a fish-out-of-water comedy where characters find themselves off their home turf at the mercy of merciless minions. Everything that can go wrong for Noah does go wrong. Miraculously, he manages to keep his bacon from getting fried, but in the process winds up running an incredibly hilarious gauntlet. The often profane but imaginative dialogue is as memorable as the diverse characters are crazy. These are the most grown-up urchins that you will ever see in a mainstream movie. Mind you, this is neither the kind of movie that you should take a child to see nor is it the kind you should watch if you like to sympathize with the protagonist. Aside from our Noah's mother and one of his college friends, virtually every character in "The Sitter" is fairly obnoxious. Our hero is the kind of guy who is not entirely trustworthy but he owns up to his mistakes and "The Sitter" ends on a positive note.
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