FILM REVIEW OF ''INSTANT DEATH" (2017)

Sometimes, a guilty pleasure can be a lot of fun.  Watching the straight-to-video, Lou Ferrigno, action DVD “Instant Death” (**1/2 OUT OF ****) revived memories of Charles Bronson’s “Death Wish” movies, Liam Neeson’s “Taken” trilogy, and the Sylvester Stallone “Rambo” franchise.  If you haven’t seen “Death Wish” (1974), you’ll have a chance to watch Bruce Willis step into Bronson’s shoes for the 2017 remake when it comes out later this year.  Suffice to say, “Death Wish” dealt with a mild-mannered New York City architect who embarked on revenge binge after his wife’s murder and his daughter’s rape during a home invasion. The Charles Bronson hero meted out vigilante justice from the barrel of a revolver to a variety of low-life criminals that prowled the streets after sundown.  Ironically, he never found the hoodlums who terrified his family.  Nevertheless, while cleaning up the city streets, he evolved into an urban legend. “Death Wish” qualified as one of the notable examples of the revenge movie genre about a private citizen who avenged his relatives after the police proved ineffectual.  

“Skin Traffik” director Ara Paiaya and scenarist Adam Davidson replicate the revenge movie formula without tampering with any of the usual clichés.  Were it not for the steely presence of body-builder Lou Ferrigno, who rampaged on television as “The Incredible Hulk” from 1977 to 1982, “Instant Death” would constitute just another routine crime thriller.  Indeed, Ferrigno is the star rather than merely a supporting character or an actor appearing in a cameo.  The 66-year old Ferrigno performed all his stunts. Now, I know what you’re thinking. Can Ferrigno act?  Although he seems self-conscious around other actors, Ferrigno plays a flawed father figure hero who might behave in such an aloof manner.  The personification of the Grim Reaper, Ferrigno’s paterfamilias suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder. The realistic, gritty action occurs primarily in contemporary London, and the filmmakers pit the former “Hulk” against a repellent Cockney mobster nicknamed ‘Razor.’ Jerry Anderson plays Razor, and he is a dead ringer for popular British tough-guy actor Ray Winstone.  Anderson plays such a deranged dastard that the actor should think twice about strolling in public without bodyguards.  Imaging what Ferrigno’s revenge-minded father will do to Razor when they tangle heightens the suspense of “Instant Death.”

Ferrigno plays veteran Special Forces fighter John Bradley.  Although he has been out of combat for six months, Bradley hasn’t recovered entirely from the untold horror. The lonely lifestyle that he describes to his sympathetic psychiatrist recalls the toxic activities that Robert De Niro’s cabbie Travis Bickle indulged in throughout director Martin Scorsese’s classic, urban shoot’em up “Taxi Driver” (1976).  The psychiatrist recommends Bradley reconnect with his two surviving family members: his grown-up daughter Jane (Tania Staite of “Crossing Bridges”) and his young granddaughter Wendy (newcomer Sophie Wembridge), who live in London, England.  Bradley catches a flight out of New York City.  After he lands and sets out to visit Jane and Wendy, Bradley witnesses a vicious gangland slaying.  A ferocious underworld enforcer, Razor (Jerry Anderson), is eradicating all rival drug dealers in his domain.  Anybody who peddles narcotics on Razor’s turf won’t die from old age.  The desperate fools who buy those forbidden narcotics don’t last long.  Razor is torturing an independent drug dealer, Carnie (Sven Hopla of “The Foundling”), when Bradley sees the murder.  Not only does Razor kill the rival drug dealer, but he kills another innocent bystander who walks in front of Bradley when Razor tries to shoot our hero.  Razor dispatches his intimidating henchmen to liquidate Bradley.  Before he eludes Razor’s thugs, Bradley guns down two of them. 

A furious Razor demands Bradley’s head.  A young street hoodlum locates Bradley after he shadows him to his daughter’s apartment building.  Naturally, Jane is ecstatic about finally seeing her dad again.  Bradley rarely spent time around his family while he was in the service. He explains he must visit an old friend in town the next day.  The old friend turns out to be Colonel Neal (newcomer Michael James MacMahon) who served with Bradley in the military.  Essentially, Colonel Neal is comparable to Samuel Trautman (Richard Crenna) from Sylvester Stallone’s “Rambo” quartet.  Trautman acted as the go-between Rambo and those who availed themselves at his combat skills.  Predictably, Razor and his hooligans show up at Jane’s door inquiring about Bradley.  When Jane cannot tell them where her father has gone, Razor’s henchmen rape her on the dining room table.  Later, Razor brandishes a razor and carves up Jane’s face.  Before he leaves, Razor smothers helpless Wendy with a pillow.  After Bradley learns about his family, he launches his own crusade of vengeance against Razor and his depraved crew. 

“Instant Death” resorts to neither humor nor comic relief characters.  The violence is staged with a sense of spontaneity, and our hero emerges as just as cold-blooded as his nemeses.  For example, Bradley holds an arrogant British gangster at gunpoint, and the gangster proposes they negotiate.  Our grief-stricken hero refuses, and the gangster’s head vanishes in a bloody explosion. This could rate as the darkest movie that Lou Ferrigno has ever toplined, and he delivers a solemn performance as John Bradley.  Paiaya produced the straightforward but violent “Instant Death” on the streets of London for added authenticity.  He does a good job of establishing both the characters of Bradley and Razor before he turns them loose on each other.  Part of the fun of watching “Instant Death” is that you can savor what the hero will do to his foes.  Mind you, you won’t find any gratuitous nudity in the unrated DVD version of “Instant Death,” because it emphasizes blood, gore, and guys. The homicidal content and the casual depiction of murder and rape may appall the squeamish but appeal simultaneously to stout-hearted action junkie fans who can tolerate a little blood and gore.  One of the chief virtues of “Instant Death” is British director Ara Paiaya doesn’t let his efficient 84-minute melodrama wear out its welcome. 

A FILM REVIEW OF "BULLET TO THE HEAD" (2013)

Watching the Sylvester Stallone shoot’em up “Bullet to the Head” (**** OUT OF ****) felt like a blast from the past.  This polished but predictable anthology of action movie clichés contains several R-rated, close-quarters, combat scenes with sufficient amounts of blood splatter and gore; some high-octane, fireball explosions; lots of snappy tough guy banter; and surprising displays of frontal female nudity.  Half the scenes reminded me of producer Joel Silver’s explosive, slam-bang, white-knuckled, testosterone-laden tales, such as “Conspiracy Theory,” “Exit Wounds, “Swordfish,” and his “Lethal Weapon” franchise.  Indeed, Silver serves as one of the producers, and “Bullet to the Head” adheres to his formula.  Meanwhile, action auteur Walter Hill drew the other half from his hardboiled melodramas.  For the record, Hill helmed the two “48 Hrs” flicks with Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy, “Extreme Prejudice” with Nick Nolte, “Last Man Standing” with Bruce Willis, and “Red Heat” co-starring Arnold Schwarzenegger and James Belushi.  Although “The Messenger” scenarist Alessandro Camon adapted the Alexis Nolent graphic novel "Du plomb dans la tête,” “Bullet to the Head” looks like “48 Hrs” and/or “Red Heat” clone.  Mind you, “Bullet to the Head” is Hill’s first theatrical release since his gritty 2002 prison melodrama “Undisputed” with Ving Rhames and Wesley Snipes.  During his absence from the big screen, Hill helmed the premiere episode of HBO’s “Deadwood,” and then the television mini-series western “Broken Trail” (2006) costarring Robert Duvall and Thomas Haden Church.”  In many respects, this action-packed, largely straightforward, odd couple buddy picture compares favorably with earlier, exceptional Stallone sagas like “Assassins,” “The Specialist,” and “Demolition Man.”  Most definitely, it surpasses “Tango and Cash” and “Stop, Or My Mom Will Shoot.”

Cast as a seasoned hit-man in the Crescent City, Sylvester Stallone tangles with a mysterious cabal of Big Easy investors who have the New Orleans Police Department on their payroll.  Director Walter Hill has juggled the occupations of the protagonists from his earlier buddy picture epics.  The cop was always the lead in the combo in the “48 Hrs” movies and “Red Heat.”  This time around, world-weary, career criminal James “Bobo” Bonomo (Sylvester Stallone of “Rocky”) is the lead, while saintly, Washington, D.C. Detective Taylor Kwon (Sung Kang of “Fast & Furious”) behaves rather naively and relies too much on his cell phone.  Ironically, the two men want to exact vengeance for the deaths of their former partners.  They agree to form an uneasy alliance, but Kwon’s conscience prompts him to constrain Bonomo. These two don’t immediately run into each other. When the plot unfolds, Bonomo and his partner Louis Blanchard (Jon Seda of “Bad Boys 2”) masquerade as cops to snuff a cocaine-snorting thug, Hank Greely (Holt McCallany of “Fight Club”), in a motel room.  Bonomo spots a tattooed prostitute cowering in the shower, but he lets her live.  This amoral murderer draws the line at shooting women.  When he is behind the wheel on the road, he swerves to avoid stray cats in front of him.  “It’s bad luck,” he assures Louis.  These two show up at a crowded bar where they are supposed to pick up the balance of their loot for the shooting.  Before either realizes they have been double-crossed, another assassin, Keegan (Jason Momoa of “Conan”), stabs poor Louis repeatedly to death in front of everybody.  He wields a small blade to hack both of Louis’ lungs so nobody in the noisy bar knows a murder has occurred.  Keegan isn’t quite as lucky with Bonomo.  Now, Bonomo wants payback.  Our hero crosses paths with a hard-nosed, Washington, D.C. police detective who is visiting New Orleans.  As it turns out, Hank Greely was his former partner in Washington.  Kwon wants the people who ordered Hank’s demise.  Sure, neither Bonomo nor Kwon have much use for each other initially, but they kind of grow on one other as they survive back-to-back fracases. 

Hill stages some gripping shoot-out scenes that genre fans will savor, and you get to see Silver's trademark Ka-Boom explosions!  Hill never lets the narrative bog down in aimless chatter or an over elaborate plot.  Stallone’s character provides deadpan narration throughout the pyrotechnics so you never take anything seriously in “Bullet to the Head.”  “Bullet to the Head” is not unlike a Tarantino thriller.  Camon and Hill wrap up everything, but leave room for a sequel since the hero’s daughter and the D.C. cop are dating.  At 66 years of age, Sylvester Stallone appears as fit as a fiddle.  This is the kind of movie where guys shed shirts and clash muscles.  He channels a little bit of “Rocky” in his tongue-in-cheek performance.  The ax fight between beefy, muscle-bound Jason Momoa and Stallone has been carefully edited to present both to maximum advantage.  You know Stallone is going to triumph, but Momoa doesn’t make it look easy.  Momoa makes a lusty villain.  No less villainous is Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje as a crippled, African investor has no qualms about murder.  Christian Slater appears briefly as a smarmy swindler with a flash drive around his neck that boasts the goods of everybody.  The interrogation scene is pretty amusing.  Clocking in at a lean, mean, 97 minutes, “Bullet to the Head” doesn’t wear out its welcome.  You don’t even have to wait around to see what’s after the end credits so you can clear out early.  Were it not for the pedigree talent involved, “Bullet to the Head” would qualify at best as a three-star rather than a four-star movie.  If you still like Stallone, you'll love "Bullet to the Head" because it is worth shelling out the bucks to watch this Spartan saga.

FILM REVIEW OF ''DREDD 3-D" (2012)

“Vantage Point” director Pete Travis and “28 Days Later” scenarist Alex Garland have conspired to make a hopelessly abysmal reboot of the British “2000 AD” comic strip.  New Zealand actor Karl Urban steps into the boots that Sylvester Stallone wore in director Danny Cannon’s “Judge Dredd” that bombed at the box office back in 1995.  Despite its estimated $50 million production cost, “Dredd 3-D” (* OUT OF ****) looks like a low-budget, made-for-television movie.  Although it takes place in a distant, post-apocalyptic America of the future, this science fiction saga delivers little high octane action and no narrative revelations.  Unlike the first “Judge Dredd” epic with its flying cars and motorcycles, “Dredd 3-D shuns “Blade Runner” airborne automobiles and hovering motorcycles.  This shallow, straightforward British/South African co-production confines itself strictly to only a few settings. Most of the low octane action occurs in an enormous skyscraper complex that houses about 60-thousand citizens.  Whereas the original “Judge Dredd” concerned our hero’s efforts to exonerate himself for being framed for the murder of a journalist on the basis of DNA evidence, the new “Dredd” amounts to a pedestrian police procedural set in a sprawling city state.  Karl Urban channels “Dirty Harry” with his raspy, low-key, monosyllabic dialogue delivery.  Indeed, he never removes his helmet during this 95-minute, R-rated urban outing. Essentially, Urban looks like Beetle Bailey because only his mouth and chin are visible. Granted, this is in keeping with the way Judge Dredd appears in the comic strip, but “Dredd 3-D” is a feature film, not a one-dimensional comic strip. 

“Dredd 3-D” unfolds in a post-nuked America.  Basically, only one city exists, and it is Mega City, with some 800-thousand residents.  Mega City occupies the east coast of the United States, roughly encompassing Boston and Washington, D.C., while everything else that lies outside its wall consists of scorched wasteland.  The Stallone “Judge Dredd” occurred in part outside the walls of Mega City,” while “Dredd 3-D” is set wholly within Mega City.  Crime has reached epidemic proportions, with twelve serious crimes occurring every minute and 17-thousand happening each day.  Street judges are so overworked that they can at best only intervene in six percent of all crime.  When “Dredd 3-D" opens, our helmet-clad hero is straddling a motorcycle and pursuing three villains in a car as they swerve through traffic while using a new drug called ‘Slo Mo.’  Judge Dredd (Karl Urban of “Star Trek”) has no problem subjugating all three criminals.  At the Hall of Justice, he learns that he has acquired a new partner, an aptly named Cassandra Johnson (Olivia Thirlby of “No Strings Attached”), who possesses psychic powers that enable her to read an individual’s mind.  Earlier, Cassandra failed an aptitude test that would have qualified her to be a judge.  These street judges have the legal authority to sentence criminals on the spot and even execute them if their misconduct is bad enough. The Chief Judge wants to get Cassandra another chance so he assigns her to Judge Dredd to reassess her candidacy as a judge. “Dredd 3-D” is reminiscent of the Dirty Harry police thriller “The Enforcer” where Harry was saddled with a rookie detective.  Anyhow, these two are dispatched to Peach Trees, a ghetto-like high rise where a major criminal, Madeline Madrigal (Leana Headey of HBO’s “Game of Thrones”), dominates the drug trade.  She has three men injected with Slo Mo, skinned alive, and hurled to their deaths from the top of the tower.  Dredd and Cassandra are dispatched to investigate.  No sooner have they set foot on the premises and arrested one suspect than they find themselves trapped in the tower.  The ruthless criminals have shut Peach Trees down and sealed it off completely so that nobody else can exit it.  What ensues is a blood bath with a high body count that our indestructible heroes survive with a close shave or two. 

“Dredd 3-D” is as one-dimensional as a cardboard punch-out book.  The characters are sketchy, and the actors who incarnate them bring little humanity to them.  Whereas “Judge Dredd” was a sardonic exercise in mock-heroic action, “Dredd 3-D” is as humorless as it is moribund.  Leana Headey is looks like a Cosmo model with scars on her right cheek.  Actually, all the villains look pretty cool, but they are at the same time incredibly incompetent.  At one point, they devastate an entire floor trying to perforate our heroes with three, six-barreled Gatling gun style General Electric M134 mini-Vulcan machine guns.  These weapons can pour out between 2000 and 6000 rounds of 7.62 mm shells a minute.  Villains like these dastards constitute little challenge for our heroes.  If this weren’t lame enough, even Cassandra with her psychic powers cannot divine the thoughts of a suspect that Dredd and she have already arrested and who is standing behind her.  This villain is able to free himself from his bonds and abduct her!  Nothing about this Judge Dredd movie is innovative.  A showdown like this between our heroes and an army of hoodlums was depicted with greater savagery in “Punisher: War Zone” (2008) and the most recent movie “The Raid—Redemption.” As for the 3-D effects, they add nothing to this lackluster exercise in déjà-vu.  Originally, 3-D movies were designed to make the audience duck when a flying projectile winged its way at them.  3-D movies like “Dredd 3-D” resemble the images that were once available on those vintage Viewmaster Viewers where you loaded a picture disc into it.  Not surprisingly, “Dredd 3-D” lives up to its title.