Combine “Independence Day” with “Ghostbusters” and then insert
Adam Sandler in another of his immature man-child roles as the hero, and you’ve
got the premise of “Mrs. Doubtfire” director Chris Columbus’ predictable but palatable
“Pixels” (** of ****), a nostalgic science-fiction fantasy about the bygone video game
arcade era. Initially, you might think Columbus
and "Mr. Deeds" writer Tim Herlihy and "Just Go with It"
scribe Timothy Dowling have done little more than synthesize elements of
“Independence Day” and “Ghostbusters” for the former “Saturday Night Live” alumnus.
Actually, the filmmakers have adapted French
director Patrick Jean’s ephemeral, two minute short “Pixels” (2010) about extraterrestrial
space invaders that masquerade as vintage video game characters. Sadly, everything about Columbus’ “Pixels” adaptation
is wholesome and lukewarm rather than imaginative and mischievous. Since he slipped into middle-age, the 48-year
old Sandler hasn’t made anything as audacious as his early, lowest-common-denominator
farces: “Billy Madison” (1995), “Happy Gilmore” (1996), “The Waterboy” (1998),
“Big Daddy” (1999), and “Little Nicky” (2000).
Later, Sandler appeared in comedies with a slightly higher IQ such as his
critically acclaimed “Punch Drunk Love” (2002), “Anger Management” (2003) with
Jack Nicholson, “50 First Dates” (2004) with Drew Barrymore, “Click” (2006)
with Christopher Walken, and “I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry” (2007) with
Kevin James. Just as he explored new
facets with his image in “Punch Drunk Love,” Sandler ventured even farther afield
with Judd Apatow’s heavyweight “Funny People” (2009) as a comedian stricken
with cancer. Sadly, he doesn't turn any corners in "Pixels."
Sandler’s recent big screen efforts have overshadowed neither
“Punch Drunk Love” nor “Funny Business.”
Indeed, “Pixels” is just as desultory as “Just Go for It” (2011),
“Grown-Ups” (2010), its sequel “Grown-Ups 2” along with his two obnoxious
farces “Jack and Jill” (2011) and “That’s My Boy” (2012). Although nothing about “Pixels” is likely to
affront or alienate anybody like “Jack and Jill” or “That’s My Boy,” Sandler’s
shenanigans as a video gamer wronged in his youth comes off as strictly superficial. Nevertheless, Columbus has fashioned a straightforward
but humorless escapade with some amusing characters that are eclipsed by impressive
CGI renderings of several 8-bit video characters, including “PAC-MAN,” “Donkey
Kong,” “Galaga,” “Centipede,” and “Space Invaders.”
“Pixels” unfolds in 1982 as 13-year old Sam Brenner (Anthony
Ippolito) and his best friend Will Cooper (Jared Riley) swing astride their
banana-seat bikes and spin off to the first video game arcade to open in their
town. Not only does Sam discover he
possesses a knack for defeating Pac-Man and Centipede, but Cooper and he make
friends with lonely 8-year-old Ludlow Lamonsoff (Jacob Shinder) whose only
friend is his grandmother. Eventually,
Sam takes his gift for predicting video games patterns to a Donkey Kong Championship. Unfortunately, he comes in second place to his
chief adversary, self-centered 13-year-old Eddie (Andrew Bambridge), who dubs
himself ‘The Fire Blaster.’ Interestingly
enough, NASA seals up competition footage in a time
capsule and blasts it off into space aboard a rocket. Optimistically, NASA wanted to establish
peaceful contact with any alien civilization. Like the best laid plans, NASA's efforts prove futile. Meantime, since Eddie trounced
him, Sam has turned into a perennial slacker. Basically, Sam has lived a
low-profile life. He got married, but his
wife cheated on him with their pediatrician.
Now, he installs home entertainment systems for a living. Basically, Sam is a loser who has accepted his place in society. Actually, Sandler looks clownish in his
bright orange Nerds company outfit that resembles the UPS drivers' summer outfit. Unfortunately, Sam is nowhere near as colorful as his outfit. Meantime, Sam’s obese buddy Will plunged into
politics and now sits in the Oval Office at the White House as our President. Nevertheless, Will has an appalling habit of
putting his foot in his mouth whenever he ventures out into the public
eye. His latest debacle involved
reprimanding a Girl Scout during a reading initiative at a kindergarten when the child corrected his
pronunciation. Their friend Ludlow (Josh
Gad of “The Wedding Ringer”) has turned into a conspiracy theorist who covers his walls with crazy newspaper stories.
Suddenly, one night at a U.S. Airbase in Guam, a mysterious
force attacks, leaves the base in a shambles of millions of cubes, and abducts a security
guard. The President assembles his
advisors and summons Sam for his input.
One of the President’s advisors is Lieutenant Colonel Violet Van Patten (Michelle
Monaghan of “Source Code”) who has just separated from her philandering husband. Violet’s hubby cheated on her with his 19-year
old Pilates instructor. Before they race
each other to the White House, Sam and Violet meet at her house after he arrived
to install a home entertainment system. The
home entertainment center is a farewell gift from Violet's husband to his son. Violet and
Sam sit in her closet and swap sentimental stories so Violet’s son Matty (Matt
Lintz of “The Crazies”) won’t see her grieve. Anyway, an enigmatic alien race has acquired
the NASA footage, but it has misconstrued it as a challenge to fight to the
death. Miraculously, Sam’s superb video
game skills once again make him a highly sought-off individual, and President Cooper assigns
both Sam and Ludlow to teach Navy SEALS how to fight these aliens. Lieutenant Colonel Van Patten has analyzed
the cube debris from the Guam base and has created light-blasting ray guns that
shatter the aliens. Incredibly, this is one of the few instances where a woman is allowed to compete with men and actually help them! President Cooper
refuses to act quickly enough to prevent another attack, and the aliens destroy the Taj Mahal. Imagine a disaster movie where no architectural icons aren't obliterated. At least, "Pixels" plays for high stakes.
Later, to heighten the suspense, the aliens abduct Matty, but his life doesn't hang in the balance. Predictably, our heroes whip the aliens with indifferent nonchalance in this PG-13 rated hokum. The showdowns with Pac-Man and Donkey Kong
generate the greatest suspense, and the special effects look terrific. The funniest scene occurs when the fictional
creator of PAC-MAN, Professor Iwatani (Denis Akiyama of “Johnny Mnemonic”),
tries to reason with a gargantuan replica of his computer-generated son and
gets his forearm eaten off. Columbus borrowed the scene from the original Howard Hawks’
chiller “The Thing from Another World.” Not even diminutive Peter
Dinklage as the adult version of Eddie can imbue any spontaneity to this
attractive but anemic laffer.
Altogether, “Pixels” qualifies as one of Sandler’s least memorable
movies.