“Armageddon”
director Michael Bay’s extravagant, but preposterous, sci-fi, fantasy yarn
“Transformers: The Last Knight” (**1/2 OUT OF ****) constitutes the fifth entry
in the Hasbro action figures inspired film franchise. Although this
fourth sequel boasts little of the spontaneity of Bay’s first “Transformers,”
this PG-13 rated installment tries to set itself apart from earlier outings.
“The Last Knight’s” larger-than-life shenanigans occur not only in the Medieval
kingdom of King Arthur’s Britain, but also on the Transformers’ native planet
Cybertron at the fringes of the Solar System. In a sense, Bay’s fifth “Transformers”
saga doubles as both a prequel and a sequel. Nevertheless, the film
suffers from convoluted plotting that virtually defies synopsis. A quartet of
scenarists--“Iron Man’s” Art Marcum & Mark Holloway, “Black Hawk Down’s”
Ken Nolan, and “I, Robot’s” Akiva Goldsman overwhelm us with too much hokum. Michael Bay veers from slapstick comedy to straightforward heroics
and the two often clash. Everything revolves around an outlandish
scavenger hunt on Earth as well as in Outer Space. Indeed, Bay and his
writers wear out their welcome as they wallow for almost two-and-a-half-hours
setting up and then concluding their predictable plot.
Mark
Wahlberg makes an encore appearance as Cade Yeager, an intrepid but unkempt Texas
inventor who sympathizes with the Autobots. Promoted from Captain to
Colonel, William Lennox (Josh Duhamel) returns to the franchise after sitting
out the third sequel “Transformers: Age of Extinction” (2014). Things
have changed alarmingly since “Age of Extinction.” Basically, mankind has
branded the Transformers—both the honorable Autobots and the dastardly
Decepticons--as ‘undesirables.’ The governments the of world have
assembled a multinational Transformer Reaction Force (TRF) to eradicate these
shape-shifting aliens. Mind you, things went sour for the Autobots during
the cataclysmic battle of Chicago in Bay’s “Transformers: Dark of the Moon”
(2011). While the Windy City was devastated, Chicago wasn’t reduced to
complete rubble. Afterward, the authorities dissolved their military
alliance with the Autobots against the wicked Decepticons. “Transformers:
The Last Knight” picks up where “Age of Extinction” ended, with Autobot
commander Optimus Prime plunging into space to find his creator.
Whereas
“Age of Extinction” opened during the Jurassic Age, “The Last Knight” unfolds
in 484 A.D. The legendary King Arthur
(Liam Garrigan of “The Legend of Hercules”) and his outnumbered troops are
waging a desperate war against the bloodthirsty Saxons. Indeed, things
look perilous for Arthur, until the sozzled magician Merlin (Stanley Tucci of
“The Hunger Games”) makes a pact with the Knights of Iacon, twelve Transformers
who sought refuge on Earth, who entrust him with a secret weapon. If Merlin will
remain mum about their presence, the Autobots will reward him. Meantime,
King Arthur’s own knights ridicule him for his confidence in Merlin. Just
as everything appears doomed, a gargantuan, fire-breathing, dragon with
three-heads swoops in over the battlefield and scorches the Saxons!
Sixteen-hundred
years later, a Transformer spacecraft crashes in a ruined sector of Chicago.
School kids gather at the crash site, but a man-made Sentinel robot patrolling
this forbidden zone opens fire on them. At this point, we’re told that
all Transformers have been outlawed, and the Transformer Reaction Force (TRF)
has been formed to exterminate all Transformers. This heavily-armed,
SWAT-team style force tangles with a spunky, orphaned, 14-year old hellion,
Izabella (Isabela Moner of “Middle School: The Worst Years of My Life”) and her
small adorable robot Sqweeks. Sqweeks and she trip up the Sentinels, and
the kids elude the authorities. They stumble across another Transformer,
Canopy, who relies on wreckage as camouflage. While the TRF deploy to
blast Canopy to pieces, Cade Yeager careens out of nowhere like the cavalry to
save them. He inspects the crashed Transformer spacecraft but he cannot
help the unfortunate Transformer. Nevertheless, the dying Transformer
gives him a medallion before it dies. Although the TRF know nothing about this magical
talisman, a Decepticon scout named Barricade spots it and informs the
villainous Megatron, the ringleader of the Decepticons. Cade scrambles
back to an inconspicuous hideaway, a sprawling junkyard in South Dakota. The
tenacious TRF track him down, and Cade abandons it. Several friendly
Autobots who have been lying low with him vamos, too. Izabella surprises
Cade with her impromptu arrival and persuades him to let her accompany him.
Naturally, Sqweeks follows.
Meanwhile,
Optimus Prime (voice of Peter Cullen) learns that Cybertron has broken into
fragments and the debris is drifting toward Earth. He locates the
sorceress Quintessa (voice of Gemma Chan), and she convinces Prime that she
created him. Quintessa resembles a giant necklace fairy flittering about
like a malevolent Tinker Bell. According to Quintessa, a group of
Transformer knights robbed her of a magical staff and entrusted it to Merlin
for safekeeping. Quintessa brainwashes Prime, and he becomes her errand
boy. She alters his name to "Nemesis Prime" and reveals that
the Earth is actually Unicron. Unicron is an age-old enemy of
Cybertron. At the same time, sinister incidents are occurring on Earth.
Huge horns have emerged from the surface all over the globe, and scientists are
mystified.
Enough of
this nonsense! Bay and his writers will keep your head spinning with all
the action and exposition and foreshadowing going on in this slam-bang,
over-the-top, robo-demolition derby. They also have too many characters,
particularly Izabella and Sqweeks. Oscar-winner Anthony Hopkins plays the
noble, but loquacious Sir Edmund Burton, a crackpot who amuses Cade and Oxford
scholar Viviane Wembly (Laura Haddock of “Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2”)
with the clandestine history of the Transformers on Earth. Of course, only
Hopkins could make all the information in his dialogue sound intriguing. According to Burton, Ms. Wembly is none other
than a descendent of Merlin, and she must get her hands on the staff to thwart
Quintessa’s scheme to annihilate Earth. Bay introduces new Autobot and
Decepticon characters. Moreover, Bay surprises us with Bumblebee’s resilience
in one scene where the TRF blast him to ribbons, but he reassembles himself and
triumphs over his adversaries. Cade Yeager and Viviane Wembly pair up to find
the staff, and find themselves in the usual number of cliffhanger predicaments.
Altogether, Michael Bay proves he is still the maestro of mindless mayhem
with this improbable but high-octane opus.
The best way to watch this movie is in the IMAX/3-D format. The dogfights between massive robots as well
as the trigger-happy soldiers look truly awesome because they appear to be
towering over us.
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