Writer & director Gianfranco Baldanello's "This Man Can't Die!” (**1/2 out of ****) with Guy Madison qualifies as an above-average spaghetti western. Baldanello penned the screenplay with “Three Dollars of Lead” writer Luigi Emmanuele and “Atlas against the Cyclops” scribe Gino Mangini. Actually, Baldanello, Emmanuele, and Mangini have written a rather formulaic but entertaining oater that relies on the literary use of foreshadowing to tell its tale of greed, redemption, and justice. Watch the box of guns & gun belts that are given to the hero in the first scene and you’ll see what I mean.
Baldanello, Emmanuele, and Mangini do a good job of establishing the action in the first scene at a cavalry fort. The army captain (Giovanni Ivan Scratuglia of “Kill and Pray”) tells our hero, Martin Benson (Guy Madison), “So far you’ve done a good job, Martin. But obviously you won’t be able to continue undercover any longer, their friends will be after you like a swarm of bees.” Benson gauges his payoff, “Instead of ten pieces of silver, I get paid in gold.” Martin Benson is a lean, mean, tall, unshaven, cigarette smoking specimen of humanity. In other words, he is a standard Spaghetti western protagonist.
Three felons that Benson brought in swing from the gallows outside the captain’s office. The captain complains, “Damnit, even with death staring them in the face, they won’t talk. The smuggling of firearms certainly won’t end with a rope around the necks of those devils outside. I don’t care how you do it but we’ve got to find out who’s in charge of this operation and where the new hide0ut is. Washington is never going to get off my back until rifles and rotgut are off the reservation. You know, Martin, I’m up for promotion.”
Benson refuses to take the assignment. “If I keep fooling around with those gun runners my hide isn’t going to be worth a damn.” The captain demands that Benson handle the job and he manages to convince him with more money that he --rather than Tony Guy (Steve Merrick) -- isn’t appropriate for the mission. “I’ve just been bought,” Benson agrees as he accepts the money. Before Benson leaves, an army sergeant enters headquarters with the guns and gun belts of the three outlaws that were hanged outside. Benson tells the captain to sent the hardware to his father and he rides out. No sooner does Benson hit the trail that two horsemen and a couple of riflemen lay an ambush for him in the sagebrush. Benson blows the two horsemen away while on horseback him wielding his Winchester repeating rifle with one hand. This doesn’t keep the bad guys from pursuing Benson. Meanwhile, at the Benson ranch, Martin’s father has disowned his oldest son because of his criminal record. This is one plot point that the scenarists never resolve. Earlier, the army captain told Martin that he could have his record wiped clean by discovering the identity of the man behind the contraband whiskey and rifle trade. Anyway, the same gang that are tracking Martin strike his parents ranch while his two brothers and oldest sister are gone to town. The gunslingers kill Martin’s mother and father; one outlaw rapes his youngest sister, Jenny (Rosalba Neri of “Lion of Thebes”), and traumatizes her so that she cannot talk.
When Daniel Benson (Pietro Martellanza), his older sister Susy (Lucienne Bridou of “Black Jack”) and their youngest brother arrive at the ranch, they find their horses have been stampeded and a wounded man is lying on their property. Initially, Daniel believes that the wounded man is one of the brigands that killed his parents. He takes the man to a cave and brings the doctor to attend to him. Meanwhile, Vic Graham (Rik Battaglia) lusts after Susy, even though she refuses to have anything to do with him. The action shifts back to Martin who discovers the rendezvous point between the Indians and the gun runners. He uses his skill with a Winchester to blow up two wagons filled with rifles. The bad guys wound him, a mere flesh wound, but he escapes and rides to the ranch to learn about the massacre of his family. The bad guys never give Martin a moment of respite. Eventually, they capture him as well as Daniel and trap them in their ranch house while they pile trees outside before they torch the structure. In the wagon that Susy drove to town to fetch the mail is the box of guns from the gun runners that were hanged at the fort in the first scene. Not only does Martin discover the ring leader of the rotgut and rifles outfit, but he also kills him during a fight in the upper story of a building.
Although this horse opera has been clearly dubbed, especially Guy Madison, the words do match the mouths even though the voices seem incongruous. The scenery isn’t as spectacular as the terrain in most Euro westerns. The dialogue isn’t as clever or catchy nor are the gunfights staged with the ostentation of those in either a Sergio Leone or Sergio Corbucci oater. On the other hand, “This Man Can’t Die!” is largely believable and pretty straightforward with its linear narrative and shuns the use of flashbacks. The performances, especially “Since You Went Away” actor Guy Madison, who earlier rode the range in 112 episodes of “The Adventures of Wild Bill Hickok,” are credible. Rik Battaglia of “The Mysterious Island of Captain Nemo” makes a suitable nemesis, while Pietro Martellanza of “Kill Them All and Come Back Alone” is good as Guy Madison’s younger brother. Composer Amedeo Tommasi contributes a good orchestral score and a James Bond style theme song, but often Baldanello borrows (or steals depending on your point of view) cues from Ennio Morricone’s “Fistful of Dollars.” The use of mixed soundtracks with a number of themes from other movies without the composer’s permission is standard operating procedure for most low-budget kung fu movies, but this is the first time that I’ve heard of this done in a Continental western. “This Man Can’t Die” draws its title not from its tough guy protagonist but from its second string hero, Tony Guy, who is mistaken for one of the marauders that murder Benson’s parents.
CINEMATIC REVELATIONS allows me the luxury of writing, editing and archiving my film and television reviews. Some reviews appeared initially in "The Commercial Dispatch" and "The Planet Weekly" and then later in the comment archives at the Internet Movie Database. IMDB.COM, however, imposes a limit on both the number of words and the number of times that an author may revise their comments. I hope that anybody who peruses these expanded reviews will find them useful.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
FILM REVIEW OF ''OBJECTIVE: BURMA'' (1945)
Warner Brothers encountered greater production problems on "Desperate Journey" director Raoul Walsh's "Objective, Burma" than any other battle front movie that the Burbank studio made during World War II. This lengthy--at 142 minutes--war film is grittier than usual and gets rather disillusioning near the end because our heroes are caught literally between a rock and a hard place.
Scenarist Alvah Bessie remembers the first time that producer Jerry Wald mentioned the idea for the film. According to Bessie, Wald called him into his office and said, "I was talking to some guys at my house last night, and they told me what a wonderful job the paratroops are doing in Burma." An hour after reading everything that the Warner Brothers Research Department had about combat in Burma, Bessie realized that it was "strictly a British operation." He told Wald, "Look, Jerry,
there are no American troops in Burma." Wald's response was, "So what? It's only a moving picture." Bessie argued that an American invasion of Burma would lay Warner Brothers open to ridicule of the worst kind. Dismissing Bessie's prediction, Wald said, "So, look, put in some British liaison officers and stop worrying." Everybody from the War Department, to the Production Code Administration, and the Office of War Information, warned the filmmakers about the controversy that they were causing, but the nonplussed Wald moved ahead with the production. Not surprisingly, Wald's cavalier treatment of the China-Burma-India Theater of Operations discredited "Objective, Burma," in Britain. British reaction was so virulently negative that Warner Brothers withdrew it from circulation after a week.
Including British liaison officers as well as a Jewish American lieutenant, Bessie wrote the script for this "A" picture's in 19 days. He observed "it was a good story, if you don't mind the fact that Burma was a British show and was not commanded by Errol Flynn." After Bessie penned the original story, Jack Warner told Wald to assign two other scribes, Randal MacDougall and Lester Cole, because in Warner's words, "Bessie can't write all the pictures in the studio." The studio hired Raoul Walsh to direct and production commenced May 1, 1944. Shooting did not conclude until August 26, 1944, and all of the filming took place in and around Burbank and Los Angeles.
"Objective, Burma" dealt with American paratroopers spearheading the invasion of Burma after the Japanese had chased General Joseph W. Stilwell (Erville Alderson of "Parachute Battalion") out of the country. An older American war correspondent, Mark Williams (Henry Hull of "High Sierra"), accompanies Captain Nelson (Errol Flynn of "Captain Blood") and his young paratroopers who drop behind enemy lines and demolish a radar station. Nelson's native guides spot Japanese troops on the march, so our heroes have to wave off two U.S.A.A.F. C-46 transport planes winging in to retrieve them. Since usable airfield exists between Nelson and Allied lines where the U.S.A.A.F. can land, the paratroopers must march 150 miles through enemy infested jungle. During the long arduous journey, Nelson divides his men into two sections. Nelson leads one section with Williams while the Jewish-American Lieutenant, Sid Jacobs (William Prince of "The Gauntlet")commands the other group. Eventually, Nelson's men link up with two survivors from Jacobs' ill-fated group. Nelson learns, to his horror, that the Japanese have captured and tortured Jacobs and his men and left him almost dead. Jacobs begs Nelson to kill him, but Nelson cannot bring himself to shoot his friend. He gives him a gun instead and lets Jacobs commit suicide. The horrified war correspondent surveys the carnage and rants that the Japanese should be wiped off the earth. At one point during production, Bessie sent a memo to Wald about this controversial scene and asked that the studio reinsert a line of his dialogue. According to the original Bessie script, Nelson said, "There's nothing especially Japanese about this . . . You'll find it wherever you find fascists. There are even people who call themselves Americans who'd do it, too."
Neither Jerry Wald nor Jack Warner re-inserted the additional line in the film as released, that Bessie had written for Nelson, and the subject never came up again, despite his protest. Meanwhile, after the grisly discovery of the tortured paratroopers, Nelson receives surprising orders that direct him to march in the opposite direction from Allied headquarters. Reluctantly, the men follow their orders while the USAAF airdrops them supplies. The remnants of Nelson's force
reach a barren hillside, dig themselves into foxholes, repel a sneaky, vicious Japanese night attack, and awaken the following morning to see gliders and
thousands of paratroopers in the skies. They witness the beginning of the Allied invasion of Burma.
In March 1944, Warner Brothers sent the War Department a copy of the "Objective, Burma" screenplay, along with a request for a technical adviser who had served with the paratroops in the Pacific Theater. The studio emphasized in its correspondence with the War Department that "Objective, Burma" would stress "the important work of the paratroopers in the Pacific Theater." Warner Brothers' Location Manager, William
Guthrie, contacted Army Colonel Curtis Mitchell and explained, "Rest assured no political angle as discussed between you and me will be brought into this picture. It will be strictly an all American affair with American personnel only. We welcome any suggestions Army would like injected." On March 11, 1944, Mitchell briefed Major General Alexander Surles about "the story of about 48 paratroopers dropped 200 miles behind the Japanese lines for the purpose of wiping out a radar station and some supply dumps." He explained that the filmmakers were "prepared to make any changes you suggest in order to keep away from any subject that might be embarrassing." Eventually, the War Department assigned Burma combat veteran Captain Charles Galbreath as technical adviser for the film production.
Warner Brothers wanted "Objective, Burma," to look as realistic as possible, especially regarding the troops. The studio requested 5 compasses, 12 infantry demolition kits without explosives, 160 D rations, 80 K rations, 2 Lister bags, 6 hand axes with covers, 4 wire cutters with covers, 24 M-1 rifles with bayonets and scabbards and 4 carbines with folding stocks. As it turns out, the cast wound up eating the rations, apparently to evoke more realism in their performances. The Army located most of the equipment, except the folding stock type carbine.
"Objective, Burma" is a first-rate combat actioneer that will make you sweat.
Scenarist Alvah Bessie remembers the first time that producer Jerry Wald mentioned the idea for the film. According to Bessie, Wald called him into his office and said, "I was talking to some guys at my house last night, and they told me what a wonderful job the paratroops are doing in Burma." An hour after reading everything that the Warner Brothers Research Department had about combat in Burma, Bessie realized that it was "strictly a British operation." He told Wald, "Look, Jerry,
there are no American troops in Burma." Wald's response was, "So what? It's only a moving picture." Bessie argued that an American invasion of Burma would lay Warner Brothers open to ridicule of the worst kind. Dismissing Bessie's prediction, Wald said, "So, look, put in some British liaison officers and stop worrying." Everybody from the War Department, to the Production Code Administration, and the Office of War Information, warned the filmmakers about the controversy that they were causing, but the nonplussed Wald moved ahead with the production. Not surprisingly, Wald's cavalier treatment of the China-Burma-India Theater of Operations discredited "Objective, Burma," in Britain. British reaction was so virulently negative that Warner Brothers withdrew it from circulation after a week.
Including British liaison officers as well as a Jewish American lieutenant, Bessie wrote the script for this "A" picture's in 19 days. He observed "it was a good story, if you don't mind the fact that Burma was a British show and was not commanded by Errol Flynn." After Bessie penned the original story, Jack Warner told Wald to assign two other scribes, Randal MacDougall and Lester Cole, because in Warner's words, "Bessie can't write all the pictures in the studio." The studio hired Raoul Walsh to direct and production commenced May 1, 1944. Shooting did not conclude until August 26, 1944, and all of the filming took place in and around Burbank and Los Angeles.
"Objective, Burma" dealt with American paratroopers spearheading the invasion of Burma after the Japanese had chased General Joseph W. Stilwell (Erville Alderson of "Parachute Battalion") out of the country. An older American war correspondent, Mark Williams (Henry Hull of "High Sierra"), accompanies Captain Nelson (Errol Flynn of "Captain Blood") and his young paratroopers who drop behind enemy lines and demolish a radar station. Nelson's native guides spot Japanese troops on the march, so our heroes have to wave off two U.S.A.A.F. C-46 transport planes winging in to retrieve them. Since usable airfield exists between Nelson and Allied lines where the U.S.A.A.F. can land, the paratroopers must march 150 miles through enemy infested jungle. During the long arduous journey, Nelson divides his men into two sections. Nelson leads one section with Williams while the Jewish-American Lieutenant, Sid Jacobs (William Prince of "The Gauntlet")commands the other group. Eventually, Nelson's men link up with two survivors from Jacobs' ill-fated group. Nelson learns, to his horror, that the Japanese have captured and tortured Jacobs and his men and left him almost dead. Jacobs begs Nelson to kill him, but Nelson cannot bring himself to shoot his friend. He gives him a gun instead and lets Jacobs commit suicide. The horrified war correspondent surveys the carnage and rants that the Japanese should be wiped off the earth. At one point during production, Bessie sent a memo to Wald about this controversial scene and asked that the studio reinsert a line of his dialogue. According to the original Bessie script, Nelson said, "There's nothing especially Japanese about this . . . You'll find it wherever you find fascists. There are even people who call themselves Americans who'd do it, too."
Neither Jerry Wald nor Jack Warner re-inserted the additional line in the film as released, that Bessie had written for Nelson, and the subject never came up again, despite his protest. Meanwhile, after the grisly discovery of the tortured paratroopers, Nelson receives surprising orders that direct him to march in the opposite direction from Allied headquarters. Reluctantly, the men follow their orders while the USAAF airdrops them supplies. The remnants of Nelson's force
reach a barren hillside, dig themselves into foxholes, repel a sneaky, vicious Japanese night attack, and awaken the following morning to see gliders and
thousands of paratroopers in the skies. They witness the beginning of the Allied invasion of Burma.
In March 1944, Warner Brothers sent the War Department a copy of the "Objective, Burma" screenplay, along with a request for a technical adviser who had served with the paratroops in the Pacific Theater. The studio emphasized in its correspondence with the War Department that "Objective, Burma" would stress "the important work of the paratroopers in the Pacific Theater." Warner Brothers' Location Manager, William
Guthrie, contacted Army Colonel Curtis Mitchell and explained, "Rest assured no political angle as discussed between you and me will be brought into this picture. It will be strictly an all American affair with American personnel only. We welcome any suggestions Army would like injected." On March 11, 1944, Mitchell briefed Major General Alexander Surles about "the story of about 48 paratroopers dropped 200 miles behind the Japanese lines for the purpose of wiping out a radar station and some supply dumps." He explained that the filmmakers were "prepared to make any changes you suggest in order to keep away from any subject that might be embarrassing." Eventually, the War Department assigned Burma combat veteran Captain Charles Galbreath as technical adviser for the film production.
Warner Brothers wanted "Objective, Burma," to look as realistic as possible, especially regarding the troops. The studio requested 5 compasses, 12 infantry demolition kits without explosives, 160 D rations, 80 K rations, 2 Lister bags, 6 hand axes with covers, 4 wire cutters with covers, 24 M-1 rifles with bayonets and scabbards and 4 carbines with folding stocks. As it turns out, the cast wound up eating the rations, apparently to evoke more realism in their performances. The Army located most of the equipment, except the folding stock type carbine.
"Objective, Burma" is a first-rate combat actioneer that will make you sweat.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
FILM REVIEW OF ''ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT'' (1942)
Humphrey Bogart tangles with treacherous Nazi spies in director Vincent Sherman's "All Through the Night," (**** out of ****) a witty World War II propaganda thriller that takes place before Uncle Sam entered the war against the Axis powers. "All Through the Night" boasts a terrific, top-notch supporting cast featuring Judith Anderson, Jane Darwell, Jackie C. Gleason, Phil Silvers, Peter Lorre, and William Demarest. Perennial Nazi impersonator, real-life German Jew Conrad Veidt of "The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari" battles with Bogart in this serio-comic espionage melodrama. A year later Bogart and Veidt locked horns again in Michael Curtiz's Oscar-winning love story "Casablanca," and Veidt played more Nazis in MGM's "Nazi Agent" and "Above Suspicion" before he succumbed to a heart attack in 1943. Scenarist Leonard "Mystery Street" Spigelgass and Edwin "Larceny, Inc.," Gilbert have penned a top-flight, lightweight, rollicking, white-knuckler that puts our hero between a rock and a hard place. "All Through the Night" shares a lot in common with Hitchcock thrillers such as "The 39 Steps" and "North by Northwest" because our wrongly accused hero has to stay one step ahead of the police to exonerate himself of charges that he murdered a nightclub owner. Anybody who loves off-beat Humphrey Bogart movies will enjoy this humorous hokum.
"All Through the Night" opens with a group of Runyonesque Broadway gamblers sitting around a table discussing the combustible European predicament. Mr. Alfred 'Gloves' Donahue (Humphrey Bogart) interrupts their heated conversation. One of Gloves' minions, Sunshine (William Demarest of "Escape from Fort Bravo"), explains what they've been doing with toy soldiers and tanks on the table in front of them, "Just showing how England can win the war." An amusted Gloves chuckles, "I'll arrange a conference between you and Churchill." Sunshine points out, "Don't you think it's time you got your mind out of the sports section and on to the front page." Gloves dismisses Sunshine's suggestion, "That's Washington's racket, let them handle it." Gloves' problems start when Louie (Phil Silvers) runs out of Gloves favorite cheese cake from Miller's Bakery. Gloves lives and breathes to munch Miller's cheesecake. When Louie tries to pass off an inferior brand, Gloves spots the difference in a heartbeat. Later, Gloves' mother 'Ma' Donahue begins to worry him about Mr. Miller's disappearance. When Gloves stumbles onto Miller's corpse in the shop basement, things really begin to click. The N.Y.P.D. is suspicious about Gloves from the start, but they don't arrest him until they find one of his gloves next to the body of a dead nightclub owner. Everything hinges on finding a young vocalist Miss Leda Hamilton (Kaaren Verne of "A Bullet for Joey") that was seen with Miller before he died. As it turns out, Franz Ebbing (Conrad Veidt) and his second-in-command Pepi (Peter Lorre of "M") are planning a 9/11 style terrorist attack not unlike a similar act of sabotage in Alfred Hitchcock's own "Saboteur" with Robert Cummings about Nazis blowing up a ship in New York harbor.
Jane Darwell of "The Grapes of Wrath" is hilarious as Gloves' presumptuous mother who is constantly interfering in her son's affairs. She gets Gloves into real trouble when she follows Miss Hamilton to a nightclub run by Marty Callahan (Barton MacLane of "High Sierra") called the Duchess Club and summons him. Lorre is particularly nasty as Ebbing's right-hand man. One of the greatest running gags in "All Through the Night" concerns Gloves' flustered chauffeur Barney (Frank McHugh of "Bullets or Ballots") who has just been married and cannot convince Gloves to let him have time enough to consummate his marriage. The Production Code Administration cautioned Warner Brothers about a lot of subversive dialogue with regard to Barney's situation. Apparently, some kind of deal was struck between Jack Warner and Joseph I. Breen over the salacious content of the dialogue. In the opening scene, for example, Sunshine argues that they can catch the Nazis with their Panzers down, a comment that drew the wrath of the Production Code, because of the implied sexuality in the remark. Nevertheless, the line made it into the film. Despite its racist content, there is a howler of a scene when Gloves' African-American valet Saratoga (Sam McDaniel of "Three Godfathers") delivers with supreme straight-faced solemnity to Miss Hamilton that "Things ain't as black as they look." Sherman keeps things moving in a dead heat as Gloves struggles to elude the police and get the goods on Ebbing and his dastardly bunch. Another hilarious scene occurs at an auction with some incredibly funny dialogue that sounds more like gibberish than actual words.
"All Through the Night" runs a close second to Raoul Walsh's Errol Flynn actioneer "Desperate Journey" as one of the best pre-World War II thrillers.
"All Through the Night" opens with a group of Runyonesque Broadway gamblers sitting around a table discussing the combustible European predicament. Mr. Alfred 'Gloves' Donahue (Humphrey Bogart) interrupts their heated conversation. One of Gloves' minions, Sunshine (William Demarest of "Escape from Fort Bravo"), explains what they've been doing with toy soldiers and tanks on the table in front of them, "Just showing how England can win the war." An amusted Gloves chuckles, "I'll arrange a conference between you and Churchill." Sunshine points out, "Don't you think it's time you got your mind out of the sports section and on to the front page." Gloves dismisses Sunshine's suggestion, "That's Washington's racket, let them handle it." Gloves' problems start when Louie (Phil Silvers) runs out of Gloves favorite cheese cake from Miller's Bakery. Gloves lives and breathes to munch Miller's cheesecake. When Louie tries to pass off an inferior brand, Gloves spots the difference in a heartbeat. Later, Gloves' mother 'Ma' Donahue begins to worry him about Mr. Miller's disappearance. When Gloves stumbles onto Miller's corpse in the shop basement, things really begin to click. The N.Y.P.D. is suspicious about Gloves from the start, but they don't arrest him until they find one of his gloves next to the body of a dead nightclub owner. Everything hinges on finding a young vocalist Miss Leda Hamilton (Kaaren Verne of "A Bullet for Joey") that was seen with Miller before he died. As it turns out, Franz Ebbing (Conrad Veidt) and his second-in-command Pepi (Peter Lorre of "M") are planning a 9/11 style terrorist attack not unlike a similar act of sabotage in Alfred Hitchcock's own "Saboteur" with Robert Cummings about Nazis blowing up a ship in New York harbor.
Jane Darwell of "The Grapes of Wrath" is hilarious as Gloves' presumptuous mother who is constantly interfering in her son's affairs. She gets Gloves into real trouble when she follows Miss Hamilton to a nightclub run by Marty Callahan (Barton MacLane of "High Sierra") called the Duchess Club and summons him. Lorre is particularly nasty as Ebbing's right-hand man. One of the greatest running gags in "All Through the Night" concerns Gloves' flustered chauffeur Barney (Frank McHugh of "Bullets or Ballots") who has just been married and cannot convince Gloves to let him have time enough to consummate his marriage. The Production Code Administration cautioned Warner Brothers about a lot of subversive dialogue with regard to Barney's situation. Apparently, some kind of deal was struck between Jack Warner and Joseph I. Breen over the salacious content of the dialogue. In the opening scene, for example, Sunshine argues that they can catch the Nazis with their Panzers down, a comment that drew the wrath of the Production Code, because of the implied sexuality in the remark. Nevertheless, the line made it into the film. Despite its racist content, there is a howler of a scene when Gloves' African-American valet Saratoga (Sam McDaniel of "Three Godfathers") delivers with supreme straight-faced solemnity to Miss Hamilton that "Things ain't as black as they look." Sherman keeps things moving in a dead heat as Gloves struggles to elude the police and get the goods on Ebbing and his dastardly bunch. Another hilarious scene occurs at an auction with some incredibly funny dialogue that sounds more like gibberish than actual words.
"All Through the Night" runs a close second to Raoul Walsh's Errol Flynn actioneer "Desperate Journey" as one of the best pre-World War II thrillers.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
REVIEW OF ''SHATTERED'' aka "Butterfly on a Wheel" (2007)
Some movies are easy to criticize in a review, pointing out the positive and the negative while applauding or panning those involved. Other movies, like the Pierce Brosnan & Gerald Butler melodrama “Shattered” (**** out of ****) [a.k.a. “Butterfly on a Wheel”] pose difficulties because you cannot plunge into details without divulging crucial plot points that would ruin the film's mystery and suspense for folks who want to see it. I thoroughly enjoyed “Shattered,” but my closest and dearest friends absolutely detested it from start to finish. Evidently, the film did not fare well at the box office because it didn’t play in the sticks where I live, Columbus, Mississippi, and it didn’t last long in theaters. Since I don't subscribe to the crappy cable where I lived, little did I know that it premiered on TNT. I envy those audiences that did see it in theaters. Again, I had a blast watching this tense, white-knuckled suspense thriller.
The first time that I saw Mike Barker's "Shattered," I watched it with the commentary track playing because I had bought it used at a Movie Gallery sale and I wanted to have some idea about what was happening in case the DVD skipped and I had to wait any length of time before I could replace it. I’ve never had a problem watching a movie that I learn stuff about as I am watching it. In fact, the second time that I watched "Shattered," I appreciated it the way some people savor good food. Now, the married couple that saw "Shattered" took an immediate dislike to it and the surprise ending didn't leaving them gasping, and they generally didn’t like anything about it, especially Maria Bello.
Pierce Brosnan, the former James Bond on the big-screen and Remington Steele on the small screen, has been monkeying around with his cinematic persona since the Bond producers sent him packing after "Die Another Day." He let his belly hang out in “After the Sunset,” admittedly a routine caper film, and most recently, he sang in “Mama Mia.” Between these epics, Brosnan played the villain in “Shattered” and he is convincing without going overboard as a psychotic lunatic.
An unshaven renegade with a grudge, Tom Ryan (Pierce Brosnan) forces his way into the lives of successful Chicago advertising executive Neil Randal (Gerald Butler of “300”) and his pretty blond wife Abby (Maria Bello of “Payback”) as Neil is taking Abby off to a girls’ night out rendezvous before he leaves on a jet for a trip with his boss. No sooner have our happily married couple hit the road than Tom pops up out of the backseat and holds them at gunpoint. Not surprisingly, Neil and Abby react with shock and their shock intensifies when Tom explains that the babysitter is part of his grand kidnapping scheme. Tom assures the Randalls that with his cell phone he can order his accomplice to kill their adorable little girl Sophie if they refuse to follow his orders.
Now, if you’re the kind of person that likes to pick holes in plots before the film has even reached its climax, you will HATE “Shattered.” My friends were bombarding me with questions and trying to guess the outcome. The wife had figured part of it out, but there was a red herring that threw them off the scent for a while. Anyway, Tom has been watching Neil so we know that he knows something and the something that Tom knows is the exact amount of Neil’s bank account, over $142-thousand dollars. At this point, we know that Neil is an egotistical sort of guy and that he has a knack for landing big accounts at his advertising agency. The Randalls have a luxurious house in the Chicago suburbs and Abby is a photographer. She appears to be happy with her husband because the sky seems to be the limit for Neil. Neil has a lot of tenacity and he isn’t afraid to admit it. He is a tiger at what he does, until he runs into Tom. At the bank, Neil and Abby withdraw everything and hand it over in an attaché case to Tom. Tom wastes no time. He pulls out a sheaf of bills and sets fire to it and then he drops the burning currency into the attaché case and tosses it lock, stock, and barrel off a bridge in Chicago.
Indeed, “Shattered” is for all practical purposes a kidnap thriller and initially I was intrigued but grew impatient with it. However, the more that I watched it, the more entertaining it became. Nobody gave a bad performance and I loved the surprise ending. Unfortunately, I don’t want to say anything else, except I feel that “Shattered” qualifies as an excellent, edge-of-your seat movie and happily most of the people who wrote about it at Amazon shared my sentiments. The filmmakers took the original title "Butterfly on a Wheel" from an Alexander Pope poem that basically translates as smashing a butterfly with a hammer with a fly swatter would serve the same purpose. Once you see the film, you'll understand the title. I love watching Maria Bello in any film and I wish that her career were more prestigious than it is because she is a talented lady. Altogether, my review doesn’t do justice to this spine-tingling, nail-biter that ripples with one surprise after another surprise.
“Shattered” is in the same league with the fantastic David Fincher thriller “The Game with Michael Douglas and Mikael Håfström’s “Derailed” with Clive Owen. Although "Shattered" carries an R-rating, there is no nudity, little bloodshed, but several tense moments and Ashley Rowe's scintillating widescreen photography at times may induce vertigo.
The first time that I saw Mike Barker's "Shattered," I watched it with the commentary track playing because I had bought it used at a Movie Gallery sale and I wanted to have some idea about what was happening in case the DVD skipped and I had to wait any length of time before I could replace it. I’ve never had a problem watching a movie that I learn stuff about as I am watching it. In fact, the second time that I watched "Shattered," I appreciated it the way some people savor good food. Now, the married couple that saw "Shattered" took an immediate dislike to it and the surprise ending didn't leaving them gasping, and they generally didn’t like anything about it, especially Maria Bello.
Pierce Brosnan, the former James Bond on the big-screen and Remington Steele on the small screen, has been monkeying around with his cinematic persona since the Bond producers sent him packing after "Die Another Day." He let his belly hang out in “After the Sunset,” admittedly a routine caper film, and most recently, he sang in “Mama Mia.” Between these epics, Brosnan played the villain in “Shattered” and he is convincing without going overboard as a psychotic lunatic.
An unshaven renegade with a grudge, Tom Ryan (Pierce Brosnan) forces his way into the lives of successful Chicago advertising executive Neil Randal (Gerald Butler of “300”) and his pretty blond wife Abby (Maria Bello of “Payback”) as Neil is taking Abby off to a girls’ night out rendezvous before he leaves on a jet for a trip with his boss. No sooner have our happily married couple hit the road than Tom pops up out of the backseat and holds them at gunpoint. Not surprisingly, Neil and Abby react with shock and their shock intensifies when Tom explains that the babysitter is part of his grand kidnapping scheme. Tom assures the Randalls that with his cell phone he can order his accomplice to kill their adorable little girl Sophie if they refuse to follow his orders.
Now, if you’re the kind of person that likes to pick holes in plots before the film has even reached its climax, you will HATE “Shattered.” My friends were bombarding me with questions and trying to guess the outcome. The wife had figured part of it out, but there was a red herring that threw them off the scent for a while. Anyway, Tom has been watching Neil so we know that he knows something and the something that Tom knows is the exact amount of Neil’s bank account, over $142-thousand dollars. At this point, we know that Neil is an egotistical sort of guy and that he has a knack for landing big accounts at his advertising agency. The Randalls have a luxurious house in the Chicago suburbs and Abby is a photographer. She appears to be happy with her husband because the sky seems to be the limit for Neil. Neil has a lot of tenacity and he isn’t afraid to admit it. He is a tiger at what he does, until he runs into Tom. At the bank, Neil and Abby withdraw everything and hand it over in an attaché case to Tom. Tom wastes no time. He pulls out a sheaf of bills and sets fire to it and then he drops the burning currency into the attaché case and tosses it lock, stock, and barrel off a bridge in Chicago.
Indeed, “Shattered” is for all practical purposes a kidnap thriller and initially I was intrigued but grew impatient with it. However, the more that I watched it, the more entertaining it became. Nobody gave a bad performance and I loved the surprise ending. Unfortunately, I don’t want to say anything else, except I feel that “Shattered” qualifies as an excellent, edge-of-your seat movie and happily most of the people who wrote about it at Amazon shared my sentiments. The filmmakers took the original title "Butterfly on a Wheel" from an Alexander Pope poem that basically translates as smashing a butterfly with a hammer with a fly swatter would serve the same purpose. Once you see the film, you'll understand the title. I love watching Maria Bello in any film and I wish that her career were more prestigious than it is because she is a talented lady. Altogether, my review doesn’t do justice to this spine-tingling, nail-biter that ripples with one surprise after another surprise.
“Shattered” is in the same league with the fantastic David Fincher thriller “The Game with Michael Douglas and Mikael Håfström’s “Derailed” with Clive Owen. Although "Shattered" carries an R-rating, there is no nudity, little bloodshed, but several tense moments and Ashley Rowe's scintillating widescreen photography at times may induce vertigo.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
FILM REVIEW OF ''BOLT 3D"
The new animated 3-D Walt Disney family flick “Bolt” (*** out of ****) is pretty doggone funny. Combine elements of the Arnold Schwarzenegger epic “Last Action Hero” (1993) with the dogs trekking across America in the 1963 Disney classic “The Incredible Journey,” and you’ll have a fair idea about what this cute canine comedy delivers. “Bolt” is the first Disney animated feature produced by the Mouse House since Pixar genius John Lasseter of “Toy Story” fame assumed creative control. Like previous Lasseter movies, such as “Cars,” “A Bug’s Life,” and “Monsters, Inc.,” the animation in “Bolt” is something to bark about. The incomparable 3-D digital projection is what distinguishes this lighthearted flick. Meanwhile, “Mulan” co-scripters Byron Howard and Chris Williams, who teamed up to helm this hilarious hokum, drum up a lot of jokes about a deluded doggie who dreams that he possesses super heroic powers. “Pulp Fiction” star John Travolta furnishes the voice for the feisty German shepherd puppy, and Disney singing sensation Miley Cyrus voices Penny, the teenager who adores Bolt at first sight when she spots the little nipper at an animal shelter.
The premise of “Bolt” is as fetching as it is far-fetched. Bolt—complete with a jagged lightning insignia across his ribs—becomes the top dog of a prime-time, Google Generation, sci-fi TV show. The contemporary equivalent of Lassie, our four-pawed protagonist shows no fear in a crisis. In the context of the show, Penny desperately searches for her father who has been abducted by an evil Bond-type villain, Dr. Calico (Malcolm McDowell of “A Clockwork Orange”), flanked by two haughty cats. Before Penny’s poppa got kidnapped, he enhanced Bolt with cybernetic powers that make this man’s best friend as powerful as Will Smith’s “Hancock.” Bolt’s prime directive is to protect his ‘person,’ Penny (Miley Cyrus of “Hannah Montana”), from Dr. Calico’s black-clad henchmen. Bolt is so strong that he can smash head-first into a car and send it spinning end-over-end 50 yards in the air. He can turn eyes into molten lasers and burn through anything. Furthermore, he can hightail it down a street faster than a greyhound on afterburners and leap above a hovering helicopter’s whirling rotor blades!
In reality, however, Bolt is nothing more than an average bow-wow. Network TV executives have fooled our hero into thinking that he has cybernetically enhanced brawn. After Bolt has dealt with the villains and gone back to his trailer, the technicians step in and remove the debris. The dead and the wounded get up and brush themselves off. Network executives refuse to let Bolt out of his trailer for fear that he will discover the truth about himself. Nothing Bolt does is real; it’s the result of carefully staged special effects. You can see the resemblance between Bolt and the “Toy Story” character Buzz Lightyear. Everything changes radically for Bolt when two sarcastic cats lure him out of his trailer. During a frantic chase, Bolt traps himself accidentally in a box of pink Styrofoam that is shipped off to New York City. In the Big Apple, three moronic pigeons lead Bolt to a cynical, declawed, black alley cat, Mittens (Susie Essman of “Curb Your Enthusiasm”), and our deluded hero takes her hostage so that he can find Penny. Leashed together like Tony Curtis and Sidney Poitier were in the 1958 civil rights thriller “The Defiant Ones,” Bolt drags a reluctant Mittens across America to Hollywood. Along the way, Bolt realizes that he is an ordinary mutt. He succumbs to hunger pangs and begs for scraps at an RV park in Ohio. Infinitely wiser than Bolt, Mittens helps the whelp make his transition from super dog to normal hound.
At the Ohio RV park, Bolt and Mittens encounter Rhino. Rhino (voiced by Mark Walton of “Chicken Little”) is an energetic hamster who rolls around in a transparent plastic exercise ball. His favorite pastime is watching TV with his sphere balanced on the remote control so he can channel surf. The clueless Rhino worships Bolt as the super hero of his dreams and accompanies Mittens and Bolt to Las Vegas where they dine off left over casino buffet food in dumpsters. Along the way, Bolt discovers the simple pleasures of riding with his head stuck out a window of a moving vehicle, his ears sailing in the breeze, with his tongue trailing from the corner of his muzzle like a pennant. Just as Bolt is ready to surrender to the brutal, harsh grind of everyday life, Rhino refuses to let his hero sink into self-pity. Actually, this highly strung little hamster steals the show once he joins them, especially in a scene where Bolt and he rescue Mittens from an animal pound.
The biggest problem with “Bolt” is its anticlimactic plot. Nothing after the electrifying first scene can match Bolt’s clash with Dr. Calico’s attack choppers and the phantom motorcyclists that blast away with missiles at our genetically-altered hero. The finale at the studio where Bolt finds that he has been replaced by a doggie double is particularly heartbreaking, but co-directors Howard and Williams don’t let us down. The animators do a splendid job of replicating Travolta’s facial expressions on the snout of the heroic canine and Travolta reads his lines with admirable restraint. Children should enjoy the antics of these talking animals, and the fantastic 3-D digital projection will knock the eyes out of the adults who are worried about surviving this 81-minute comedy without reward. Watching “Bolt” in any format other than 3-D is a waste of time.
The premise of “Bolt” is as fetching as it is far-fetched. Bolt—complete with a jagged lightning insignia across his ribs—becomes the top dog of a prime-time, Google Generation, sci-fi TV show. The contemporary equivalent of Lassie, our four-pawed protagonist shows no fear in a crisis. In the context of the show, Penny desperately searches for her father who has been abducted by an evil Bond-type villain, Dr. Calico (Malcolm McDowell of “A Clockwork Orange”), flanked by two haughty cats. Before Penny’s poppa got kidnapped, he enhanced Bolt with cybernetic powers that make this man’s best friend as powerful as Will Smith’s “Hancock.” Bolt’s prime directive is to protect his ‘person,’ Penny (Miley Cyrus of “Hannah Montana”), from Dr. Calico’s black-clad henchmen. Bolt is so strong that he can smash head-first into a car and send it spinning end-over-end 50 yards in the air. He can turn eyes into molten lasers and burn through anything. Furthermore, he can hightail it down a street faster than a greyhound on afterburners and leap above a hovering helicopter’s whirling rotor blades!
In reality, however, Bolt is nothing more than an average bow-wow. Network TV executives have fooled our hero into thinking that he has cybernetically enhanced brawn. After Bolt has dealt with the villains and gone back to his trailer, the technicians step in and remove the debris. The dead and the wounded get up and brush themselves off. Network executives refuse to let Bolt out of his trailer for fear that he will discover the truth about himself. Nothing Bolt does is real; it’s the result of carefully staged special effects. You can see the resemblance between Bolt and the “Toy Story” character Buzz Lightyear. Everything changes radically for Bolt when two sarcastic cats lure him out of his trailer. During a frantic chase, Bolt traps himself accidentally in a box of pink Styrofoam that is shipped off to New York City. In the Big Apple, three moronic pigeons lead Bolt to a cynical, declawed, black alley cat, Mittens (Susie Essman of “Curb Your Enthusiasm”), and our deluded hero takes her hostage so that he can find Penny. Leashed together like Tony Curtis and Sidney Poitier were in the 1958 civil rights thriller “The Defiant Ones,” Bolt drags a reluctant Mittens across America to Hollywood. Along the way, Bolt realizes that he is an ordinary mutt. He succumbs to hunger pangs and begs for scraps at an RV park in Ohio. Infinitely wiser than Bolt, Mittens helps the whelp make his transition from super dog to normal hound.
At the Ohio RV park, Bolt and Mittens encounter Rhino. Rhino (voiced by Mark Walton of “Chicken Little”) is an energetic hamster who rolls around in a transparent plastic exercise ball. His favorite pastime is watching TV with his sphere balanced on the remote control so he can channel surf. The clueless Rhino worships Bolt as the super hero of his dreams and accompanies Mittens and Bolt to Las Vegas where they dine off left over casino buffet food in dumpsters. Along the way, Bolt discovers the simple pleasures of riding with his head stuck out a window of a moving vehicle, his ears sailing in the breeze, with his tongue trailing from the corner of his muzzle like a pennant. Just as Bolt is ready to surrender to the brutal, harsh grind of everyday life, Rhino refuses to let his hero sink into self-pity. Actually, this highly strung little hamster steals the show once he joins them, especially in a scene where Bolt and he rescue Mittens from an animal pound.
The biggest problem with “Bolt” is its anticlimactic plot. Nothing after the electrifying first scene can match Bolt’s clash with Dr. Calico’s attack choppers and the phantom motorcyclists that blast away with missiles at our genetically-altered hero. The finale at the studio where Bolt finds that he has been replaced by a doggie double is particularly heartbreaking, but co-directors Howard and Williams don’t let us down. The animators do a splendid job of replicating Travolta’s facial expressions on the snout of the heroic canine and Travolta reads his lines with admirable restraint. Children should enjoy the antics of these talking animals, and the fantastic 3-D digital projection will knock the eyes out of the adults who are worried about surviving this 81-minute comedy without reward. Watching “Bolt” in any format other than 3-D is a waste of time.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
FILM REVIEW OF ''THE LAST CONFEDERATE" (2005)
History veracity doesn’t necessarily translate into cinematic virtuosity. The well-intentioned people that fought tooth and nail to produce the 2005 Civil War romance “The Last Confederate: The Story of Robert Adams” (* out of ****) a.k.a. “Strike the Tent,” are direct descendants of the protagonist. Co-director, producer, scenarist, and leading man Julian Adams, who plays his real-life great-great grandfather Robert Adams, deserves recognition for this reverential independent film production that depicts one Southerner’s view of the War Between the States. Indeed, Adams has won several Indie film awards for this effort. Nevertheless, “The Last Confederate” qualifies as a tedious re-enactment with leaden performances by all except Mickey Rooney in a bit part as a bedridden Pennsylvania uncle. However, I must add that “The Last Confederate” is worth watching, even though I found it lacking. I had to opportunity to speak with Julian Adams, the man who wore all the hats on the production, and he shared his experiences in making the film. Although I didn’t like this movie, I have a great deal of admiration for the trials and tribulations that Adams endured to get it produced and distributed. Anybody who reads this critique has the right to disagree with my appraisal of the film. Mr. Adams took issue with my appraisal. Feedback isn’t something that I often receive. Had Adams been a Hollywood mogul, I’d have laughed in this face, but he isn’t a mogul. He knows that his film isn’t perfect, but it isn’t perfect because he didn’t have a budget.
As the descendant of a Mississippi Civil War soldier, I enjoy movies told from the Confederate perspective, but “The Last Confederate” conjures up little suspense and excitement, and the dialogue is hopelessly contrived. Sadly, the actors and actresses could have been reading their lines right off cue cards for all the heart that they put into their performances. Once again, this is an independent production and good talent doesn’t come without some considerable expense. Let’s just say that they performed their parts as the late Spencer Tracy observed. They got their lines out and they didn’t bump into the furniture. As the hero, Adams doesn’t generate a great deal of charisma, but then he did have his hands full with producing this epic, right down to sinking his own money into the handguns and the muskets.
Technically, everything looks accurate enough, but dramatically, this period piece never generates momentum, even during the explosive battle scenes. Adams manages to stage one good gunfight in a shack toward the end. Indeed, most of the epic scale battle sequences are simply re-enactors fighting battles with cameras set up on the periphery of the action. (I know this because I shot video of the battle of Shiloh and there were only certain places that cameras were allowed to be set up.) These scenes with hundreds of dutiful re-enactors parading around and discharging their black powder arms contribute solid production value, but they don’t bolster the drama. Adams renders no judgments against either side, North or South, and the political content is conspicuously absent, but “The Last Confederate” was made to pontificate about values. Adams told me that he was simply relating the facts of history. In any case, on his tight budget, adopting an attitude would have been more than his low budget could have accommodated. The romance between Adams and a Pennsylvania woman, Eveline McCord (co-scenarist Gwendolyn Edwards of “The Broken Hearts Club”), who came to South Carolina to teach school before hostilities, lacks any vibrancy. Again, it’s really a shame, but this stuff really happened.
Directors A. Blaine Miller and Julian Adams relate their yarn in flashback. Our hero, Captain Robert Adams, rushes to the aid of a wounded Confederate soldier and looks up to find a Union soldier taking a bead on him with his revolver. The remaining 90 or so minutes that ensues is devoted to events before and after the war, and there is a hint that perhaps the protagonist didn’t survive this trial by bloodshed. Miller and Adams never make the protagonists seem sympathetic until the middle of the action when Adams and two of his friends engineer an escape from a Federal prison and a grudge-totting Yankee officer chases them. The filmmakers lacked the budget to develop the kind of tension that would make you fear for the lives of the characters. For the record, Adams survived the war, and Eveline and he raised four children and ran a school. What makes Robert Adams is important and essential as a Confederate patriot is never explained. Julian Adams doesn’t provide enough insight into his character to differentiate him from countless other characters. He strikes a gallant figure, but we never get under his skin.
Alas, the fortunes of low budget filmmaking prevented Adams from addressing this problem. The romance between the hero and the heroine is sterile. Some histrionics wouldn't have hurt this otherwise flat-lined drama. Shawn Lewallan’s color photography makes the grade, but there isn’t much subtlety in his lighting. If you suffer through the end credits, the producers reveal that they invoked dramatic license to make their history more palatable. Ostensibly, “The Last Confederate” boasts ambitious intentions, but delivers only a modicum of dramatic impact. Comparisons with the multi-million dollar “Cold Mountain” are inevitable. Initially, when I reviewed this film (which I bought with my own bucks, I described it rather disparagingly as “Dull Mountain.” I still think it is pretty dull, but I will be a man enough critic to applaud Mr. Adams for making this film. He invested his heart and soul in “The Last Confederate.” While I didn’t care for this movie, I appreciate it a lot more after having a conversation with Mr. Adams. Just because I didn’t like it—for purely artistic reasons—doesn’t mean that you will dislike. Ultimately, Julian Adams is a better producer than he is a director.
As the descendant of a Mississippi Civil War soldier, I enjoy movies told from the Confederate perspective, but “The Last Confederate” conjures up little suspense and excitement, and the dialogue is hopelessly contrived. Sadly, the actors and actresses could have been reading their lines right off cue cards for all the heart that they put into their performances. Once again, this is an independent production and good talent doesn’t come without some considerable expense. Let’s just say that they performed their parts as the late Spencer Tracy observed. They got their lines out and they didn’t bump into the furniture. As the hero, Adams doesn’t generate a great deal of charisma, but then he did have his hands full with producing this epic, right down to sinking his own money into the handguns and the muskets.
Technically, everything looks accurate enough, but dramatically, this period piece never generates momentum, even during the explosive battle scenes. Adams manages to stage one good gunfight in a shack toward the end. Indeed, most of the epic scale battle sequences are simply re-enactors fighting battles with cameras set up on the periphery of the action. (I know this because I shot video of the battle of Shiloh and there were only certain places that cameras were allowed to be set up.) These scenes with hundreds of dutiful re-enactors parading around and discharging their black powder arms contribute solid production value, but they don’t bolster the drama. Adams renders no judgments against either side, North or South, and the political content is conspicuously absent, but “The Last Confederate” was made to pontificate about values. Adams told me that he was simply relating the facts of history. In any case, on his tight budget, adopting an attitude would have been more than his low budget could have accommodated. The romance between Adams and a Pennsylvania woman, Eveline McCord (co-scenarist Gwendolyn Edwards of “The Broken Hearts Club”), who came to South Carolina to teach school before hostilities, lacks any vibrancy. Again, it’s really a shame, but this stuff really happened.
Directors A. Blaine Miller and Julian Adams relate their yarn in flashback. Our hero, Captain Robert Adams, rushes to the aid of a wounded Confederate soldier and looks up to find a Union soldier taking a bead on him with his revolver. The remaining 90 or so minutes that ensues is devoted to events before and after the war, and there is a hint that perhaps the protagonist didn’t survive this trial by bloodshed. Miller and Adams never make the protagonists seem sympathetic until the middle of the action when Adams and two of his friends engineer an escape from a Federal prison and a grudge-totting Yankee officer chases them. The filmmakers lacked the budget to develop the kind of tension that would make you fear for the lives of the characters. For the record, Adams survived the war, and Eveline and he raised four children and ran a school. What makes Robert Adams is important and essential as a Confederate patriot is never explained. Julian Adams doesn’t provide enough insight into his character to differentiate him from countless other characters. He strikes a gallant figure, but we never get under his skin.
Alas, the fortunes of low budget filmmaking prevented Adams from addressing this problem. The romance between the hero and the heroine is sterile. Some histrionics wouldn't have hurt this otherwise flat-lined drama. Shawn Lewallan’s color photography makes the grade, but there isn’t much subtlety in his lighting. If you suffer through the end credits, the producers reveal that they invoked dramatic license to make their history more palatable. Ostensibly, “The Last Confederate” boasts ambitious intentions, but delivers only a modicum of dramatic impact. Comparisons with the multi-million dollar “Cold Mountain” are inevitable. Initially, when I reviewed this film (which I bought with my own bucks, I described it rather disparagingly as “Dull Mountain.” I still think it is pretty dull, but I will be a man enough critic to applaud Mr. Adams for making this film. He invested his heart and soul in “The Last Confederate.” While I didn’t care for this movie, I appreciate it a lot more after having a conversation with Mr. Adams. Just because I didn’t like it—for purely artistic reasons—doesn’t mean that you will dislike. Ultimately, Julian Adams is a better producer than he is a director.
FILM REVIEW OF ''UNDEAD OR ALIVE'' (2007)
“Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” meet “Return of the Living Dead” in former “South Park” scribe Glasgow Phillips’ directorial debut “Undead or Alive,” (**1/2 out of ****), a creepy, tongue-in-cheek, zombie western starring former “Saturday Night Live” comedian Chris Kattan and “Desperate Housewives” hunk James Denton. Everybody looks like they had a good time making this frontier farce about a couple of hard-luck cowboys on the lam from a posse of zombies. Mind you, “Undead or Alive” never takes itself seriously and prefers to spoof its elements rather than scare the daylights out of us. Writer & director Phillips tosses a few surprises into this supernatural saga while the camaraderie between Luke (Chris Kattan) and Elmer (James Denton) is sufficiently strong enough to make us laugh at their tribulations right up to the twisted finale. Indeed, Chris Kattan and James Denton reminded me of Bob Hope and Bing Cosby in one of their road comedies. “From Dusk Till Dawn” make-up effects wizard Robert Kurtzman makes his usual sterling contribution that boosts “Undead or Alive” into the ‘must watch’ category. The flour-faced ghouls are shown gnawing on enough brains and getting shot enough times to make it worth watching at least once. “Slumber Party Massacre 2” lenser Thomas L Callaway endows “Undead or Alive” with a larger-than-life look. Some of his splendid widescreen compositions that make this “Blazing Zombies” horse opera appear almost artistic. Clocking in at a trim 91 minutes, Phillips doesn’t wear out his welcome and provides suitable closure. Although it doesn’t rank as the greatest zombie western ever made, “Undead or Alive” qualifies as entertaining enough to sit through a couple of times, with sturdy production values and an amusing dialogue.
“Undead or Alive” establishes its premise immediately in a prologue about the legendary Apache chieftain Geronimo (Lew Alexander) who concocted something called ‘the white man’s curse’ that turns ordinary, everyday Anglo-Saxon Americans into flesh feasting fiends. The action unfolds at a hard scrabble farm where a farmer Ben (Brian Posehn of “Eulogy”) somehow comes down with Geronimo’s curse. He pulls an Ozzie Osborne and bites the head off a chicken before he tears into his wife and your daughter. The story shifts then to the frontier town where an Army deserter on the run, Elmer Winslow (James Denton), climbs off the tailgate of a wagon that he hitched a ride on to cut the dust from his throat in the local saloon. He observes there is not being a piano player and settles behind the ivories to plink out a tune. A sexy saloon girl (Patricia Greer) who loves to display her cleavage decides to accompany Elmer. Luke Budd (Chris Kattan) picks that moment to saunter into the saloon with some form of desert plant for his so-called ‘princess,’ only to find the slut cuddling up with Elmer. Later, Luke explains that she had told him that she’d marry him. Luke and Elmer tangle briefly, wind up on the floor, and find themselves staring into the business end of a shotgun with the town sheriff Claypool (Matt Besser of “Drillbit Taylor”) standing over them. Claypool hauls them off to the calaboose, takes their boots, and confiscates Elmer’s $500. They encounter the skin eating zombie farmer locked up in a nearby cell. Eventually, Elmer picks the cell door and they get the drop on Claypool, recover their loot, and hightail it out of town. Predictably, when they skedaddle out of town, Luke rides off in the wrong direction. Generally, Luke is a goofy galoot in a singing cowboy outfit. Elmer describes him later on “as a brokenhearted cowboy that doesn’t know his ass from a bag of sweet potatoes.” That line of Phillips’ dialogue has an Elmore Leonard flavor.
Sheriff Claypool regains consciousness and unties his pot-bellied deputy Cletus, but by then Ben has taken a chomp out of Cletus, so Cletus takes a chomp out of Claypool. The sheriff hangs Ben and assembles a four-man posse to ride with Cletus and him on the trail of our heroes. Before long Claypool and Cletus realize that they love the delicious smell of their posse and chomp on them, turning them into zombies. While Claypool and his posse scour the sagebrush for our heroes, Phillips shifts the story back to the town. The citizens cut Ben down, but discover to their horror that he is still alive and starved for human flesh. Ben embarks on a human buffet and turns everybody into a zombie. Meanwhile, our heroes fall victim to an Apache maiden, Susan (Navi Rawat of CBS-TV’s “Numbers”), who is Geronimo’s niece and speaks fluent English. She explains that she was educated at a New York boarding school. She disarms and strips them of everything except their Stetsons and boots. Later, after they sweet talk her, she gives them their clothes and guns back and they try to ambush Claypool’s posse only to realize that the lawmen have mutated into bona fide zombies and cannot be killed by bullets or arrows. Not even the surefire George Romeo shoot-them-in-the-head strategy works. Evidently, the only positive way to kill the zombies is to literally chop their heads off. These zombies resemble those in "Return of the Living Dead" and Romeo's "Land of the Dead" because they retain some semblance of motor function and can think to a limited extent. Luke, Elmer, and Susan outrun the posse only to be captured by Elmer’s old U.S. Army buddies who arrest them and escort them back to their fort near the Grand Canyon. When they ride into the fort, our heroes and their army escort get the surprise of their lives.
Glasgow Phillips has written a fairly entertaining zombie western. Classically speaking, it could be compared to a Budd Boetticher based on its story arc. Our heroes escape from jail, a posse chases them, and each side confronts the other at a mountain-top army stockade. Whether he knows it or not, Phillips has pulled elements from classic westerns into his oater. Cletus warns our heroes after they have been jailed that the sheriff plans to tie them to the hitch rack and horse whip them for their rambunctiousness. This is a clear homage to “One-Eyed Jacks,” the classic western where Dad Longworth (Karl Malden) whips the hero (Marlon Brando) for everybody to see. The western town and the western outfits all look authentic, except for Kattan’s B-movie cowboy gear. The special effects get pretty nasty toward the end in the army fort and the ending isn’t exactly a happy one. The DVD comes with an insightful commentary track with many of the stars and the director. “Undead or Alive” is better than most critics say.
“Undead or Alive” establishes its premise immediately in a prologue about the legendary Apache chieftain Geronimo (Lew Alexander) who concocted something called ‘the white man’s curse’ that turns ordinary, everyday Anglo-Saxon Americans into flesh feasting fiends. The action unfolds at a hard scrabble farm where a farmer Ben (Brian Posehn of “Eulogy”) somehow comes down with Geronimo’s curse. He pulls an Ozzie Osborne and bites the head off a chicken before he tears into his wife and your daughter. The story shifts then to the frontier town where an Army deserter on the run, Elmer Winslow (James Denton), climbs off the tailgate of a wagon that he hitched a ride on to cut the dust from his throat in the local saloon. He observes there is not being a piano player and settles behind the ivories to plink out a tune. A sexy saloon girl (Patricia Greer) who loves to display her cleavage decides to accompany Elmer. Luke Budd (Chris Kattan) picks that moment to saunter into the saloon with some form of desert plant for his so-called ‘princess,’ only to find the slut cuddling up with Elmer. Later, Luke explains that she had told him that she’d marry him. Luke and Elmer tangle briefly, wind up on the floor, and find themselves staring into the business end of a shotgun with the town sheriff Claypool (Matt Besser of “Drillbit Taylor”) standing over them. Claypool hauls them off to the calaboose, takes their boots, and confiscates Elmer’s $500. They encounter the skin eating zombie farmer locked up in a nearby cell. Eventually, Elmer picks the cell door and they get the drop on Claypool, recover their loot, and hightail it out of town. Predictably, when they skedaddle out of town, Luke rides off in the wrong direction. Generally, Luke is a goofy galoot in a singing cowboy outfit. Elmer describes him later on “as a brokenhearted cowboy that doesn’t know his ass from a bag of sweet potatoes.” That line of Phillips’ dialogue has an Elmore Leonard flavor.
Sheriff Claypool regains consciousness and unties his pot-bellied deputy Cletus, but by then Ben has taken a chomp out of Cletus, so Cletus takes a chomp out of Claypool. The sheriff hangs Ben and assembles a four-man posse to ride with Cletus and him on the trail of our heroes. Before long Claypool and Cletus realize that they love the delicious smell of their posse and chomp on them, turning them into zombies. While Claypool and his posse scour the sagebrush for our heroes, Phillips shifts the story back to the town. The citizens cut Ben down, but discover to their horror that he is still alive and starved for human flesh. Ben embarks on a human buffet and turns everybody into a zombie. Meanwhile, our heroes fall victim to an Apache maiden, Susan (Navi Rawat of CBS-TV’s “Numbers”), who is Geronimo’s niece and speaks fluent English. She explains that she was educated at a New York boarding school. She disarms and strips them of everything except their Stetsons and boots. Later, after they sweet talk her, she gives them their clothes and guns back and they try to ambush Claypool’s posse only to realize that the lawmen have mutated into bona fide zombies and cannot be killed by bullets or arrows. Not even the surefire George Romeo shoot-them-in-the-head strategy works. Evidently, the only positive way to kill the zombies is to literally chop their heads off. These zombies resemble those in "Return of the Living Dead" and Romeo's "Land of the Dead" because they retain some semblance of motor function and can think to a limited extent. Luke, Elmer, and Susan outrun the posse only to be captured by Elmer’s old U.S. Army buddies who arrest them and escort them back to their fort near the Grand Canyon. When they ride into the fort, our heroes and their army escort get the surprise of their lives.
Glasgow Phillips has written a fairly entertaining zombie western. Classically speaking, it could be compared to a Budd Boetticher based on its story arc. Our heroes escape from jail, a posse chases them, and each side confronts the other at a mountain-top army stockade. Whether he knows it or not, Phillips has pulled elements from classic westerns into his oater. Cletus warns our heroes after they have been jailed that the sheriff plans to tie them to the hitch rack and horse whip them for their rambunctiousness. This is a clear homage to “One-Eyed Jacks,” the classic western where Dad Longworth (Karl Malden) whips the hero (Marlon Brando) for everybody to see. The western town and the western outfits all look authentic, except for Kattan’s B-movie cowboy gear. The special effects get pretty nasty toward the end in the army fort and the ending isn’t exactly a happy one. The DVD comes with an insightful commentary track with many of the stars and the director. “Undead or Alive” is better than most critics say.
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